FORGETTING IS SO LONG. because we all gotta get that character torture in, dammit
[The scenes are familiar, every detail experienced as vividly as the first time - or maybe even more so. Atsushi couldn't have described the scent of the orphanage or the way its walls bounce back the sound, but now that he's experiencing them again, they match his memories with such intensity that the scene almost seems more real than reality.
It is reality, he's pretty sure. Even if you don't know Atsushi, it's probably not difficult to recognize the child with a similar choppy haircut - 11 years old; 8 years old; even younger than that - as the young man who stands there, witnessing his own past like a ghost. The surroundings are so dreary, they seem to mute the harsh things happening - or maybe that's just how Atsushi has managed to live with the memories. There's nothing positive to see here, only beatings, abuse, constantly being told that the world would be better off if he were dead... He's kept in chains, injected with God only knows what, drowned... One scene fades into the next seamlessly, and there doesn't seem to be an end to them.]
I don't... understand.
[How did this happen? It's unpleasant, yet he can't seem to tear himself away to look for an exit. None of the memories disturb him as much as they should, acceptance having always been a prerequisite for surviving in that place, even if the fear never went away. Only the appearance of one particular man unsettles Atsushi at all - and even then, he can't seem to leave.
That man is dead, and Atsushi knows it. If he tells himself that often enough, maybe the memories will disappear again.
Or maybe he's just using that as an excuse for why he can't seem to move.]
Atsushi Nakajima | Bungou Stray Dogs | cw: child abuse
[The scenes are familiar, every detail experienced as vividly as the first time - or maybe even more so. Atsushi couldn't have described the scent of the orphanage or the way its walls bounce back the sound, but now that he's experiencing them again, they match his memories with such intensity that the scene almost seems more real than reality.
It is reality, he's pretty sure. Even if you don't know Atsushi, it's probably not difficult to recognize the child with a similar choppy haircut - 11 years old; 8 years old; even younger than that - as the young man who stands there, witnessing his own past like a ghost. The surroundings are so dreary, they seem to mute the harsh things happening - or maybe that's just how Atsushi has managed to live with the memories. There's nothing positive to see here, only beatings, abuse, constantly being told that the world would be better off if he were dead... He's kept in chains, injected with God only knows what, drowned... One scene fades into the next seamlessly, and there doesn't seem to be an end to them.]
I don't... understand.
[How did this happen? It's unpleasant, yet he can't seem to tear himself away to look for an exit. None of the memories disturb him as much as they should, acceptance having always been a prerequisite for surviving in that place, even if the fear never went away. Only the appearance of one particular man unsettles Atsushi at all - and even then, he can't seem to leave.
That man is dead, and Atsushi knows it. If he tells himself that often enough, maybe the memories will disappear again.
Or maybe he's just using that as an excuse for why he can't seem to move.]