[ khlyen trained her to divorce herself from her feelings. to be cold. emotionless. without attachment. she knows now that he did it because he knew that the hullen would try to make her one of them one day, that she wouldn't survive the transition otherwise. people like johnny, people who give a shit? they don't make it. they die.
he'd been trying to protect her by breaking her apart. she knows that, but it doesn't make it easier.
and the thing is? the thing is, he failed. he has emotions. she's formed attachments. and when bruce draws her to his side, she doesn't resist, but lets herself rest more firmly against him. after a while, softer, trying not to listen to her younger self break from the bonds and grab the knife, trying not to listen to the man's scream as yalena kills him: ]
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he'd been trying to protect her by breaking her apart. she knows that, but it doesn't make it easier.
and the thing is? the thing is, he failed. he has emotions. she's formed attachments. and when bruce draws her to his side, she doesn't resist, but lets herself rest more firmly against him. after a while, softer, trying not to listen to her younger self break from the bonds and grab the knife, trying not to listen to the man's scream as yalena kills him: ]
He did it to protect me.
[ and she has no idea what to make of that. ]