[ Cain's holding himself tense and still besides Reinhardtzar. Staring straight ahead, and the tableau of himself and Leona, and his own blank face reflected in the mirror.
He remembers all too well his own feelings. How he'd shoved down his grief, how he'd held it together, because Leona needed him to. How he'd known that Leona wasn't seeing him — not really, hadn't since then, not since Torhid's fall. That every time she looked at him, she saw his brother instead, and the loss of everything she'd loved.
And Cain remembers making the decision that he'd let her look at him and see that. That if she needed to see Abel instead of Cain... then he'd bear that, for her sake.
He grits his teeth for a moment. Reinhardtzar's the last person he wants seeing this, because Reinhardtzar of all people is perceptive enough to look at it and understand all too well what it means. ]
Don't worry. [ He keeps his voice level; it's not hard, he's had practice, more even than Reinhardtzar knows, with all the reminders of his brother that El Nysa's thrown at him lately. ] Just because you don't see me losing it here doesn't mean I didn't cry my eyes out over him earlier.
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He remembers all too well his own feelings. How he'd shoved down his grief, how he'd held it together, because Leona needed him to. How he'd known that Leona wasn't seeing him — not really, hadn't since then, not since Torhid's fall. That every time she looked at him, she saw his brother instead, and the loss of everything she'd loved.
And Cain remembers making the decision that he'd let her look at him and see that. That if she needed to see Abel instead of Cain... then he'd bear that, for her sake.
He grits his teeth for a moment. Reinhardtzar's the last person he wants seeing this, because Reinhardtzar of all people is perceptive enough to look at it and understand all too well what it means. ]
Don't worry. [ He keeps his voice level; it's not hard, he's had practice, more even than Reinhardtzar knows, with all the reminders of his brother that El Nysa's thrown at him lately. ] Just because you don't see me losing it here doesn't mean I didn't cry my eyes out over him earlier.