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nysalogs2018-03-06 06:47 pm
milesedgelord) wrote in nysalogs2018-03-06 06:47 pm
March Catch-all (open)
Who: Character Name (milesedgelord) & You.
What: March Catch-all.
When: The first three weeks of March.
Where: Olympia
Warning(s):None. Will update if needed.
House 69: [Open to all]
[In the week following the riots, Miles came home to find that not only had his shared residence been raided and looted, it had also been burnt in places. He was grateful that he and his housemate had decided to vacate the property during the early days, though he had a dislocated shoulder and three cracked ribs to show for. However, it would have been far far worse if they had been caught inside while the flames were going. He counted his blessings.
Still, it was frustrating to have his home vandalized for the second time in the six months that he had lived here. He was going to have to work harder and move to a better area soon.
If he were to have any visitors they would see him attempting to clean off graffiti on the exterior of the house. There was a small pomeranian running about underfoot yapping excitedly as he worked. It was obvious that he was straining when reaching, only to stop and clutch at his torso, cursing in a loud string of colorful German.]
Please don’t give me that look!
[Was he talking to the dog? Who knew?]
milesedgelord) & You. What: March Catch-all.
When: The first three weeks of March.
Where: Olympia
Warning(s):None. Will update if needed.
House 69: [Open to all]
[In the week following the riots, Miles came home to find that not only had his shared residence been raided and looted, it had also been burnt in places. He was grateful that he and his housemate had decided to vacate the property during the early days, though he had a dislocated shoulder and three cracked ribs to show for. However, it would have been far far worse if they had been caught inside while the flames were going. He counted his blessings.
Still, it was frustrating to have his home vandalized for the second time in the six months that he had lived here. He was going to have to work harder and move to a better area soon.
If he were to have any visitors they would see him attempting to clean off graffiti on the exterior of the house. There was a small pomeranian running about underfoot yapping excitedly as he worked. It was obvious that he was straining when reaching, only to stop and clutch at his torso, cursing in a loud string of colorful German.]
Please don’t give me that look!
[Was he talking to the dog? Who knew?]
no subject
[Venom can almost hear his heart drop when Miles introduces them. He should be helping his friend back into the chair, but he can't move.]
It's all right, Miles. I know who Phoenix is.
[But how does one approach a delicate subject that's about to come to light?]
We've slept together.
[Blunt honesty, of course.]
So the other person was a childhood friend, someone you've known for years.
[He's mostly speaking to himself, but he's quickly retreating further and further into his own head. He's seen all this before, with watching Lord Zato return and proclaiming Millia is his reason for being. He finds a little happiness, and it's the same scenario...]
no subject
[Well, he certainly didn't disagree with Venoms tactics. If anything, perhaps it was for the better that they had found out this way. He genuinely did not know either of them already knew each other. His only disappointment being that, if that were the case, he could have told them sooner.]
Mmn. I've known Miles for a while, yes.
[Sighing out, he made his way inside slowly. Slowly taking a seat at the couch as he braced himself for what was probably going to be a fairly heavy conversation.]
Since I was nine to be precise. Although we haven't started sleeping together until a few months ago.
So, you two really met at the winter gala huh?
[How disastrously ironic.]
no subject
[The revelation finally hit him. Wow, that was late. He stared, wide-eyed, open-jawed from one man to the other.
He was quiet for a good long while before letting out a deep sigh and pinching the bridge of his nose under his glasses. He stood up silently, grunting slightly and retrieved a full bottle of bourbon from his bag, placing it on the table. He opened the bottle and poured the bourbon into the teacups instead, sliding one over to Venom.
He was exhausted, suddenly. He hoped that the alcohol would dull the edge of the pain as well. He tossed back the drink in one go, before pouring himself a second.]
November was the first time, we were sexual. And yes, Phoenix, I believe it was late in the evening when I had made Venom's acquaintance.
[Turning to Venom, he spoke.]
...I had no idea that it was you, that is Phoenix's paramour. I suppose I can see why he would be interested, though you are younger than I was expecting.
However, I do have a question for you Venom.
Do you just go around kissing middle-aged men? I mean, is that your type?
[He didn't mean to be catty. But the pain was bad and this was supposed to be his only break.]
Still. I suppose we should get everything out in the open.
no subject
I don't see how that's any of your business, Miles. But if we are being honest, no, I don't go around kissing middle-aged men.
[He could go on about his unhappiness and finally finding a shred of light to cling to, but he doesn't bother. His heart hurts, knowing that history's repeating itself. He gets up, putting on his blank face and fighting off any tears.]
I have no reason to be here anymore.
no subject
[Phoenix's expression grew soft with worry as he looked towards the other man. He could understand the reason for such a response. He would probably behave the same way if Miles decided to start acting like that towards him.
But he also knew any of them walking out at this point would solve nothing.
No, he needed to figure this out.]
Miles stop being a jerk and let him explain his side. It's what we do right? Gather all sides to a story? I thought you of all people would be able to understand that.
[Sighing out, Phoenix shifted in his seat enough to lean forward.]
In all truth neither of you have figured out anything too new about this. I was open over the fact that I was with other people. I just genuinely didn't think either of you knew each other...
no subject
He looked up at Venom, noting his expression. God, was he being tactless again? He remembered what it was like to try and put a brave facade through an emotionally trying situation when he was younger. His own expression softened.]
Venom, I'm sorry.
That was tactless of me to say after you were kind enough to look at my injuries.
Please stay and let us talk about this.
[He took off his glasses and set them aside.]
You have been open and communicative all the way through Phoenix. Probably more so than I have been. I was just surprised and am still trying to figure all of this out.
no subject
Time to let it out, Venom.]
I didn't mean to come between you two. I'm still new to this whole "dating" thing and having any form of a personal life. Granted, I've been attracted to others, but none quite like you, Phoenix. Even outside of Wyver's atmosphere and the temptations of the Red Light District, I still feel something more for you.
And Miles, despite your question, I do look up to you. And there was a time when I wouldn't have minded pursuing you as a possible partner. But had I known of your connection, I wouldn't have done any of this.
I'm sorry.
[Venom doesn't hesitate to take the shot in the teacup.]
no subject
And Miles already knew how Phoenix had felt, he had admitted it some months ago without hesitation. After all, it was hard to deny that, after all these years of building tensions, that what he felt wasn't real.
None the less--]
What has happened here isn't your fault Venom and you shouldn't have to take the blame for something you genuinely feel.
[He sighed, bowing his head as he contemplated things over.]
I only wish I knew what it was you were feeling much sooner.
[And then he looked up, his expression taking up a tone of seriousness he never had to show during his time in El Nysa so far.]
Do you mean it? Everything that you've just said?
[Did he really end up dragging these other men around by the heartstrings without realizing it?]
no subject
[He wasn't quite expecting a love confession for his friend right there and then, but it made sense. Venom from the friendship he had shared with him seemed like he was prone to feel things intensely.]
However, I'm happy it is out in the open. It is brave of you to be telling us this and I appreciate your honesty. I can relate to the feeling of being in over your head when it came to romantic relationships. I've never "dated" nor had sexual relations with anyone before arriving here, either.
[Miles sighed softly before refilling both of their cups again, before sliding the bottle towards Phoenix. Venom's feelings towards Phoenix he could understand, but he was surprised that Venom could have considered him? He knew that makeout session was mostly due to the aphrodisiacs in the red light district but He didn't really see why anyone would consider him for any such thing.]
These feelings are all new and thus uncharted territory. I think that is why is doubly important for us to try and figure this out.
no subject
I haven't, either. Before here, I was loyal and devoted to one man, the one who meant the world to me. But many things happened and I couldn't fully express what I felt.
[He pauses, wondering why he's being so open with these two.]
Forgive me. You don't need to know any of this.
[Who would want to listen to an assassin, anyway?]
no subject
Was he really the person here with the most sexual experience under his belt?
That felt weird for some reason.]
You shouldn't feel ashamed expressing yourself and the reasons for your thinking Venom.
[Sighing out he felt his shoulders slump slightly before he looked down at the bottle that was passed over to him. Guess Miles was done being mad at him.]
If we're getting previous experience out there, I've only been with one person before arriving here. And it was quite some time ago.
Yet despite that, I still have trouble getting over bits of it. There's no need to talk about that at the moment though.
[Instead he took a moment to look up at Miles, before passing his gaze over to Venom. His stare somewhat intense, although it was understandable considering what he was about to say.]
Miles and I may have known each other for a long time, but you were the first man I've ever been with physically. Because of that, I won't lie that my feelings towards both of you have been fairly complicated.
[He lifted the bottle, closing his eyes as he brought it to his lips.]
I suppose I was trying my best to simply consider my interests between you both as purely physical. But Miles was able to quickly make me realize how flawed that would be.
Perhaps it's good that you two actually managed to know each other first.
[And with that he took a quick swig of the sharp liquid. Letting it burn down his throat and warm his body.
They called it liquid courage for a reason, did they not?]
I think it will make things easier in sorting out our feelings.
Past heartbreaks really makes it quite difficult to open up to others, doesn't it?
no subject
No more apologies, please talk to us about anything that is on your mind.
[He took a sip of his drink as Phoenix said his piece. Iris...There was a time when he had believed that Phoenix and Iris would surely be together and had used his pull as a prosecutor to get her a lighter sentence. It was easier to run away to Germany than to assuage his guilt over the feelings he had held for his friend at the time.
He had never admitted such outright though. It was the sort of presumptuous thing to do as a young man. Saying that he knew better than the people involved in what was good for them. He refused to make that mistake again.]
I didn't have any romantic inclinations in the past, asides from what I've spoken about already with Phoenix.
I had buried all my sexual interests deep in the ground under the pretense of work. But I suppose I was more or less afraid of being hurt. I was afraid of the sort of emotional intimacy that physical intimacy can bring with it.
It makes sense that the two of you have an attraction towards one another. It helps that Venom is genuinely a sweet person. And I doubt, that with the disgustingly optimistic person Phoenix can be, it is hard not to fall for him.
[Was he teasing a little bit?]
As refugees, there is so little we have now. We lost our homes, our loved ones and even a bit of our old selves.
I think that is why the friendships we have forged here is so important to me. Both of you are very important to me.
no subject
Sweet? Attractive? Those words are alien to him.
Still, he cannot help feeling he has some traits in common with the other two. And he's doing his best to forge friendships he never dreamed of having.
But that doesn't excuse him from coming between them. Childhood friends that had a rapport before he came into the picture. He knew what was going to happen.
He pushes away the empty teacup, not wanting to dull his senses any further. He gets to his feet and starts for the door.]
There's nothing more for me to discuss. I'll be leaving, now.
no subject
[What?
Why?
Phoenix could feel his body tense as Venom had managed to decline their offer to talk matters over so easily. Such mixed messages made his head feel like it was spinning. What did Venom want out of this? What was the point of bringing up such important information if there was no follow through?
As a lawyer... No. As the person he was, he simply could not accept that.]
I don't accept it!
[Perhaps it was a bit off-putting, slamming his hands on the table before him, while everyone else was behaving so civilly. Maybe even more so since he was the one who mentioned acting like adults.
But he simply could not allow Venom to leave without an explanation!
Instead, he looked up at Venom, his eyes direct and determined as he attempted to meet his gaze.]
I don't accept that you're willing to walk away just like that. I don't accept that you are capable of saying such things without any reason or explanation. And I don't accept that you are so willing to stop our conversation on such an open-ended note.
There is obviously something you are hiding, some reason or explanation you don't seem to trust us with. And how do you think you can claim such feelings as if they are something sincere when you can't even trust me enough to talk to me?!
[And with that his shoulders relaxed. Sighing out heavily in hopes to control his own tone and temperament. Making sure that, with the next thing he said, he spoke softly and from his heart.]
Venom, those feelings... Do you mean them? Because if you do you have to learn that liking someone comes with trust and communication. It comes with being able to understand one another while mutually getting to know each other. Because there is a difference Venom, between loving someone and the concept of being in love.
And if you really do feel that way, the least you could do is respect me enough to give me an explanation.
--Venom's Feelings--]
I had to...
no subject
Where does he even begin to respond to that? Phoenix doesn't understand anything about him, and as much as Venom wants to reach out, he knows he can't. It'll just cause more unnecessary pain for all of them. He knows he can be anything here, but his past still haunts him, and remembering some of the reactions before... it hurts.]
I don't know.
[He pauses, crossing his arms.]
Because I've never felt anything like this before. But I know what happens if I stay. I'll get in the way of your happiness.
[And he's not just referring to Phoenix. That goes for Miles, as well. Having his own feelings never worked out, so this is the best choice. Friendships are one thing, but people like him don't deserve to have the love and respect a partner can bring.]
My feelings here don't matter. Now please let me leave with my dignity.
[He turns away, but it's obvious that tears have started to roll down his cheeks, the tiny droplets peeking through that curtain of hair.]
no subject
And yet here was someone who not only admitted that they felt something so intensely for him but adamantly refused to even give him a chance.]
That's not fair...
[He braced himself as he spoke. Doing his best to speak as calmly as possible.]
You claim I know nothing about you but then go ahead and make all these assumptions about me when you know just as little. You say you like me, but you barely even know me save for what little time we've spent together here.
So why? Why won't you even so much as give me a chance to understand? Is your dignity more important to you than trying to figure out what it even is we are experiencing?
[He's fighting past the tears that are welling in his own eyes. He is far too determined to get to the source of all this after all.]
How can you say such things and then so easily wish to walk away from it all?
Are you really just going to call off everything? Just like that?
What happens to us then?
no subject
He sighs, hugging himself tighter at the thought. How selfish of him.]
What happens is I leave the two of you be. I'm sorry, but I cannot allow myself to get in the way again.
Please take care, Nick. And thank you for all that you've done.
[So yes, he is walking away. Without another word, and without looking back, he leaves the house, hoping he can find a way to mend the growing void in his heart.]
no subject
Venom was hurt, obviously and shutting himself down in a way to protect himself from getting hurt further. Driving at him now would only raise that flight or fight response in him, so it was no surprise to see him storm out.
"Try and propose a threesome" Byerly had advised him. Good thing he didn't try and follow that. He couldn't help the small self-depreciating chuckle escape at the ludicrousness of the situation.
Of course, it was complicated. Everything in his life was so damn complicated. He couldn't walk ten feet without some sort of dead body cropping up. Why should his romantic life be any different? How could he even think that someone like him could have something resembling that?]
Verdammter Mist![German was his favorite language to express his frustration after all. His baritone coming out all the harsher because of it.]
This whole thing is a steaming pile of shit. I suppose a man cannot even enjoy tea time in this hellhole.
[He stood up and began to bus the table. The sandwiches he worked so hard on were cold and uneaten.]
no subject
He felt his fists clench against the table, partially blocking out Mile's snide remark as he let his mind circle and his train of thought escalate.]
... I'm going after him.
[He simply couldn't let such a situation sit. He could not leave Venom alone when the poor man was obviously so upset.]
no subject
[Of course. Typical Phoenix behavior. His words were more sarcastic than anything else. He pressed his fingers massaging his temples. A tension migraine he had incoming was almost as bad as the pain he felt in the rest of his body. He dumped the sandwichs into the trash. What was the point anyway?]
If you need me, I'm going to be in the bath.
[He needed a long hot bath to ease a bit of his pain, physical and otherwise. A long bath and the rest of that bourbon sounded like a good idea right about now.]