nysalogs | [open-ish] pain is supposed to heal with time

Entry tags:

[open-ish] pain is supposed to heal with time

Who: Reign Fear (

eaudevamp) & Friends/Anyone
What: Hostage/rescue aftermath
When: 24th onwards
Where: His home, the Institute, Thesa Station, Shades Darker
Warning(s): Sad vampire, mentions of death, self-inflicted pain/BDSM, possible smut?

[ It had been a few days since the hostages were rescued, but Reign didn't feel like he'd achieved much despite managing to save them with the help of other rescuers. It was a combined effort that should have been a success, but the group Reign was in didn't quite manage so. They had guessed the wrong location, and thus lost precious time to find the correct place. But that was done now, and the extremists either escaped or were killed/apprehended, Reign didn't care.

No, he truly did care, but he found it hard to actually do so when some of his friends had ended up as hostages. That, he could deal with, but not death. It was a strange and unfamiliar situation for him to face, and thus it hit him harder than he expected.

For the next few days, Reign lived his life almost like a literally zombie, looking like an undead (though he really wasn't). He mostly shut himself up in his home, spending a bit of time with his pet giraffe, Scorch, or dabbling in his perfume research and creation in an attempt to get his mind off the pain eating into him. Sometimes he replied to messages sent to him, other times they went ignored. And yet life still must go on, so Reign returned to the Institute to work, sometimes stopping by to look into a particular office in the hopes of seeing a certain demon. But it wasn't enough.

So when travelling up to Thesa Station was finally available, Reign headed straight for the pods, standing or sitting in front of one pod containing a blond man. Anyone who noticed would either see him crying, whether silently or wailing his heart out, or mumbling and telling his friend about the events that had occurred. However, the pain didn't lessen, and so at night, Reign would go to Shades Darker for a special event, a night meant for patrons to partake in some BDSM play in one of the backrooms decorated in a dungeon setting. He allowed himself to be blindfolded, his wrists bounded to chains hanging from the ceiling, shirtless and displaying strips of red welts from an earlier session. At least this kind of pain would numb him, even if only for a while. Who's next? ]

[[ OOC : If you would like a specific starter, hit me up at

miershyk ]]

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[And now in its place sits Mephisto, leaning forward with his elbows on the desk and his chin in his hands. Unlike the last time Reign saw him, there's no blood nor traces of rot, and both of his bright green eyes are looking back at him.]

[...also, Reign's probably still scratching him behind the ear, if he didn't pull his hand back.]

Long time, no see... Reign.

[ Reign just... stared at the dog.

A talking dog.

He opened his mouth, wanting to say something, when— ]

[ That familiar poof of smoke, and an even more familiar face, had Reign struck speechless. He wasn't dreaming, right? Mephisto looked as he was since the last time he saw the demon, all healthy parlor and without a hint of injury or wound on his person.

Yeah, his fingers were still scratching the dog—now demon's—ear.

Give him a moment.

And then Reign stood, knocking the chair back, as he climbed over the desk and tugged Mephisto close to him, arms wrapping around the demon tightly. There was so much he wanted to say, wanted to ask. What happened. How did Mephisto come back from the dead. Was this real? He wasn't dreaming, right?

But all that came out was a choked cry as Reign buried his face in the crook of Mephisto's neck, the demon's name coming out muffled. ]

Edited 2018-03-27 13:43 (UTC)

[Somehow Mephisto isn't expecting to be yanked into a hug, but it's happening. He's a little thrown at first, jerking back in surprise-- but then he relaxes, reaching up to rest a hand over the back of Reign's head, stroking his hair. It was the sort of affectionate gesture Mephisto generally only gave after a particularly rough play session, but-- Reign had more than earned at least this much.]

[Maybe even more than he realizes -- he doesn't know that Reign was there in his final moments.]

Now now, there's no need for that... I'm right here, aren't I?

[But his own voice sounds a little weaker than usual -- soft and sad, hinting at the vulnerability hiding beneath the surface that he'd been trying to suppress all this time.]

...I'm sorry for breaking my promise. But I would hope having me here now might make up for it?

[ Perhaps Reign should have been more careful with how tightly he was hugging Mephisto, but he couldn't control himself and hold back. The head patting was nice, reminding Reign of those times after their play session, though this was entirely different. It carried a deeper meaning, a different weight.

He sniffled, nodding as he slowly pulled back, hands tentatively running through Mephisto's hair, petting his face. Part of Reign wanted to rail at Mephisto for breaking his promise, for not staying a little longer, but he couldn't find it in him to be angry. Mephisto was back and alive, and that was that mattered. ]

There's one thing you can do to make it up to me.

[ Without another word, Reign leaned in and pressed his lips to Mephisto's, perhaps a little harder than intended, the kiss full of his unexplainable and mildly conflicted feelings for the demon. ]

[The kiss catches him off-guard as well, though it's no less pleasant for it. He allows his eyes to slide closed, arms reaching out to wrap around Reign's back and hold him close.]

[But unlike Reign, Mephisto's thoughts are going in a slightly different direction. Just what was this, he wondered? He hadn't realized just how close Reign had grown to him these past months. The image of him crying over his bedside as he lay dying is not one likely to leave him soon...]

[But there's something else there too. A strange sinking feeling that he's made a mistake somewhere along the line. That this closeness between them was impermanent. That he's allowed Reign to grow too fond of him.]

[For a demon like Mephisto, to consider Reign a friend was already a fairly big gesture. But was it comparable to whatever feeling was driving this kiss of his? He didn't know. But he felt certain that if he were to question it too much, Reign might no longer be able to be by his side like this.]

[And so, for now, he focuses on this kiss and the thrill it brings to his chest, hoping that by the end of it, he might bring a smile back to Reign's face.]

[ For the briefest moment, Reign expected Mephisto to pull back, because he knew this kiss wasn't warranted. It had none of that lustful, pleasure-filled passion to it, the usual prelude to some nice sexytimes. But Reign didn't quite care. He remembered Steve's words in his head, how one realised how important a certain person was when something happened to them.

This was what Reign felt now. He couldn't quite put into words what he was feeling for Mephisto, whether it was born out of mutual attraction or merely a one-sided-almost-crush-but-not-quite. He enjoyed being with Mephisto, and the sex was great, but it was so much more than that.

Reign knew that there was no way he could have Mephisto to himself, and it didn't seem likely to limit himself to the demon only. However, in this room, in this time, he wanted to imagine it so. And thus he hummed happily when Mephisto reciprocated, taking his time and delving his tongue into the other's mouth, wanting to taste him and ascertain for himself that Mephisto was truly alive.

For now, Reign wanted to enjoy this kiss for as long as he could, as long as Mephisto would let him. ]

[However long Mephisto allows turns out to be a long time. He deepens the kiss, letting the moment grow oddly romantic as he brushes his hand up over Reign's face and down through his hair. This sort of connection was exactly what he regretted leaving behind when he died before -- even if he still doesn't quite understand the depths of it.]

[But he won't let things escalate past this, and at a certain point, his own emotions start getting the better of him -- and he pulls back. But he keeps his hands rested firmly on Reign's shoulders, not wanting to let him go entirely.]

...haa, my... that's quite the welcome back. Did you really think death would be enough to take down someone like me? I'm rather stubborn, you know.

[--is what he says, but that tired look in his eyes says far more about how he feels about the whole ordeal. Even days later, he found it difficult to sleep.]

[ Feeling Mephisto's warmth, the feel of the demon's hand on him, was like the confirmation Reign needed to know that Mephisto was truly alive and that he hadn't been hallucinating about the other.

Reign let out a moan as the kiss deepened, letting himself be carried away by whatever feeling it was between them. He didn't quite know if what he felt for Mephisto was akin to like. Sure, he like Mephisto, had a certain fondness for him, but was it close to love? Reign can't be sure, and he didn't want to think too much about it. A twinge in his chest reminded him about Shell, and when Mephisto broke the kiss, Reign was actually relieved.

There was a small smile on Reign's lips, almost wry, before he chuckled awkwardly. ]

D-don't expect this to happen again. Not that I want you to die another time. [ A brief pouting, though the way he touched Mephisto's cheek soften the jab of his words. ] I don't know. You died, and I though you were really gone for good.

[ A thumb brushed under Mephisto's eye, the one that had been missing previously during the hostage fiasco, his touch gentle. Mephisto clearly looked like he needed proper rest. ]

How are you holding up? Have you been getting enough sleep?

[he doesn't really address any of what Reign says about his death -- mostly because he doesn't want to think about it more than he has to, but also because there's still a lot about himself Reign doesn't know. Explanations that wouldn't make sense otherwise. Things Reign no doubt deserved to know, but now... but maybe now wasn't the time.]

[Still he allows all the touching, a part of him certainly enjoying the attention. Not to mention it was... nice... to have someone so genuinely worried over him like this. He wasn't exactly the most beloved figurehead back home, after all.]

This isn't exactly my first experience with death, even if it was particularly unpleasant this time around... ah, but I suppose I haven't been sleeping, no.

That's one of the reasons I'm here, actually. I was hoping to find an old blend of that tea I was working on a few months ago. I believe I mentioned at the time that the earlier batches caused drowsiness.

[And then the later ones caused actual #thirst, so he's gotta be careful here tbh.]

[ The question would be, when the time came for Mephisto to tell Reign more about himself, would Reign look at him differently. All the things the demon had done, whether it was done righteously or not. Then again, Reign knew that everyone would always have a black spot in their heart, perhaps somewhere deep down that they don't know about.

Reign certainly did have dark notions in his thoughts before, despite all the cheeriness he tended to project around.

Nonetheless, he continued to pet Mephisto, not even caring that he was actually sitting on top of the office desk. If he could have his way, Reign would have parked his ass on the demon's lap ~~where he rightly should be~~. ]

Oh...? Oh! Those tea blends!

[ Yeah, Reign remember with acute clarity what the side effects of a particular batch produced. It had led to some interesting times between them. Reign felt his cheeks heat up, and he coughed awkwardly into his hand. ]

Ahem, I'm pretty sure I've seen it around somewhere when I was tidying this place up.

[ He climbed off the desk, trying to hide his embarrassment by making himself busy searching through the selves. Mephisto probably knew better than him where those tea blends were kept. ]

Oh? Then shall I just leave it to you?

[He says as he just leans back in his chair with a sigh, closing his eyes. The truth is, he should know where they are, but he's had problems with his memory since the brainwashing -- and letting himself obsess over it, much as he would like trying to find something, causes him to feel a painfully familiar sense of dread that he'd much rather avoid.]

[...but mostly he's just tired and hey, if Reign's willing to do it, he'll let him.]

[He'll be able to find his box of tea blends easily enough. But when he does, he'll find that each little box has a description! For some reason, it seems every blend seems to be for treating pain. And while most just list the side effects, others have more creative notes-- one of which only says "A++ effects on vampires" and another that simply says "For Mister Slaine" with a picture of a frowny face and a smiley face and an arrow showing the intended effect of the tea (a tea that makes people happy??).]

[Most of them list drowsiness as a side-effect, but one seems to have it underlined about four times in red pen -- which is likely the one he's looking for.]

Don't worry, Mephisto. I'll find it in no time. You just sit back and rest, all right?

[ With his back facing Mephisto, Reign didn't even know that the demon had done just that until he looked over his shoulder. The demon really didn't look too well despite his revival. If anything, Reign was determined to make Mephisto feel good, so he returned to searching for the tea blends.

What he found had him raising a brow as he read through the description on each boxes, swallowing heavily when he saw the one specifically for vampires. Was that from the little experiment on him? Reign was quite certain it was. The one for Slaine had him chuckling softly. knowing just what it was intended for.

Soon enough, he found one that seemed to have the largest side effect for drowsiness, and though Reign wasn't sure if it's the right one, but he had a feeling it'll help Mephisto sleep. Then he was rummaging around for the tea sets, which he easily retrieved, having visited Mephisto's office so often that he knew by heart where certain items were.

Before long, there was a nice steaming cup of tea, which Reign carefully placed in front of the demon, one hand settling on the other's shoulder so as not to startle him awake too abruptly. ]

Hey, I've the tea prepared. I don't know if it's done right, but I've read a bit on how to make tea.

[ Hopefully it wouldn't taste too horrible. What if he'd put too much water, or not enough? Was the dosage sachet enough? ]

[He's not actually asleep -- he wouldn't be seeking out the tea if he were able to fall asleep on his own right now. But every time he tries, he finds himself worrying about where he'll be when he wakes up, and ultimately isn't able to fall asleep.]

[And so, he doesn't even open his eyes when Reign sets the tea cup down, instead just holding his hand by the edge of the desk and using his powers to bring the handle over to him. It's only after he's taken a nice long sip that he peeks open one eye to look over at Reign.]

It's bitter, actually. But that's hardly your fault -- the only thing this blend is good for is sleeping. It tastes rather bad otherwise.

[--he says, taking another drink anyway.]

[ When Mephisto didn't move, Reign grew worried. Only when the tea cup began to move that Reign relaxed, watching with a critical eye as the demon took a sip of the tea.

He grimaced upon being told about the tea's flavour, though it seemed that was how it was meant to be. ]

Do you have honey? Some kind of sweetener for it?

[ Reign would keep watch until Mephisto had drank the last of the drink. ]

Normally I keep sugar in here, but I haven't had the time to restock yet. It hasn't been all that long since I woke up on Thesa, after all.

[He takes another sip before setting the cup aside. The drowsiness caused by the tea was fairly instantaneous for humans and the like, but for him, it was far more subtle. But he does yawn -- the warmth of the tea itself enough to have his eyelids feeling a bit heavier.]

I suppose this might sound a bit strange to you, but if it's all the same... I'd like to apologize once more. Had I a choice in the matter, no one would have ever seen me in that state.

Even my own familiars find it unpleasant -- the sight of a god in his final moments.

[ Reign reached a hand out to run his fingers through Mephisto's dark hair. It lacked its usual lustre, and Reign hoped it would gradually return as Mephisto's health improve. His fingers slip down the demon's face, stopping briefly at the part where Mephisto's eye had been missing previously. As if realising what he was doing, Reign slowly pulled back. He didn't want to see too touchy feely, but he couldn't help wanting to continually ascertain for himself that Mephisto was here. ]

You've apologised enough. All that matters is that you're here now.

[ His lips quirked a bit, piqued by new details about the demon. ]

Familiars, eh? You've not shown me before. What do they look like?

[He'll actually allow as much touchy-feely business as Reign desires -- the least he could do after causing him so much anguish. Though it was still a strange feeling, to think someone would mourn him personally in such a way...]

Ah, they're rather cute, actually. They've been quarantined up on Thesa, so I haven't been able to summon them until now... they're demons like myself, of course, but the differences are rather obvious.

[Lazily, he raises up his hand and snaps his fingers. And with a little poof of smoke, standing on the desk between them is a pink bat with large button-like eyes and patches sewn into it like fabric.]

[And as soon as it's summoned, it chirps and hops over towards Mephisto to nuzzle its face against his shoulder, d'aww.]

[ If Mephisto wasn't careful, Reign was going to spend his entire time tailing after the demon, draping his long arms all over the other, and possibly be a general menace. Mephisto's death had been quite an impact on Reign, and he had the urge not to lose sight of the demon any time soon.

Reign blinked when the familiar appeared, and it took him a while to register that yes, it resembled a bat with its pink skin and those large button-like eyes. ]

Awwww, how adorable~~~

[ Of course, the next moment Reign was almost jealous in the way the familiar nuzzled up against Mephisto. Hey! That was supposed to be his spot! But he wasn't going to complain. He was sure the bat-like familiar missed its master. ]

Does it have a name?

It's a demon called komorigasa, but I suppose it's never had a proper name, no. It'd be rather strange for one to name his umbrella, don't you think?

[Demon culture differences... not all of them had a need for proper names, so they simply never had them. The little bat umbrella probably preferred this anyway.]

But you know... speaking of names, I never did tell you my real name. But after everything... I'd say you more than deserve to hear it now.

Komori... gasa? [ Reign tried to pronounce the word, brows furrowing a bit, before his eyes widened. ] An umbrella? Your familiar is an umbrella that... looks like a bat?

[ He leaned forward and to the side a bit, having a close look at the bat-umbrella, now seeing its similarities.

Hearing Mephisto bringing up about his real name had Reign straightening, all his attention on the demon. ]

Wait. Isn't Mephisto your name? [ There was a twinge in Reign's chest. Had Reign not been trustworthy enough for Mephisto to entrust him with this secret? He mentally shook his head, dispelling that disappointing though. Perhaps Mephisto had a reason for it. Reign schooled his expression, listening with the utmost seriousness. ] I'm listening.

To put it more accurately, it's a demon that possesses umbrellas. Typically demons can't exist in the physical world without possessing something in it -- and in that sense, I wasn't lying to you when I told you my body was human back when we first met.

[Which is something he'll mostly just gloss over, not sure how much he may have implied as much in past -- and not really caring to focus on it, if he can avoid it. More than anything else, the fact that he was possessing the body of an innocent human tended to upset non-demons the most.]

But no, Mephisto Pheles is not my real name. Neither is Johann Faust -- the name I use among those who I lead to believe that I'm human. Though there's significantly more overlap these days.

But they're both names I've used for the greater part of the past 200 years. And I've gone by countless others in the past. I've been around for a very long time, after all. Longer than most mortals can even comprehend.

That makes sense.

[ Reign was beginning to see the connection between demons and their hosts. So likely the Mephisto he was seeing right now wasn't his true form either. Reign wondered how would Mephisto really look like.

Honestly, he wondered how long had Mephisto lived, or at least lived in this current host body. Two hundred years was a long time, and Reign couldn't even begin to imagine living that long. He may be a vampire, but he wasn't immortal like the myths. ]

I'm beginning to think that you've existed since the beginning of time. [ He'd found out that Johann Faust was the name Mephisto used at the Institute, though the latter was more amongst those whom he was close with, it seemed. Then there was that real name, and Reign suspected that perhaps knowledge of that name held certain powers over the demon. ]

So... what are you originally named as? [ Reign's question came out in a soft voice, almost afraid to ask, because this was such an important occasion, a privilege that he knew only a select few had the knowledge of. ]

Ah, how very astute of you. The truth isn't that far off, actually.

My true name is Samael. I'm one of the eight demon kings known collectively as the Ba'al, who rule over our respective elements in our home realm of Gehenna. Before coming here, I was considered the King of Time -- and with the mere snap of my fingers, time itself would bend to my command.

[There's a reason he's developed such an ego over the years -- even without his full powers, that cockiness remains... or at least it did. Normally, he'd be telling all of this with a bit more bravado, with a powerful noted sense of pride. But right now, he's a bit more subdued, muted. The pride is there and carries in his smile, but there's a certain sense of melancholy underneath his words.]

[He's no king of time anymore, after all.]

Naturally, I'd prefer that you continue to address me as Mephisto in the company of others -- or Faust, as necessary. But when we're alone, feel free to call me whatever you'd like.

[ So Mephisto was really that old. Reign should have known, with Mephisto being a demon and all. But it seemed to hit him now just how ancient the other was.

Hearing Mephisto —Samael— talk about himself was an eye-opener, realising how powerful Mephisto truly could be if he so wished to display his powers. It was a lot to take in, and it was actually a bit surprising to Reign to see how... almost humble, Mephisto seemed when he spoke.

Though considering what happened recently, that made sense. ]

Of course! Your secret is safe with me! [ Reign replied with conviction, then a beat later, in a softer voice: ] ...Samael. [ Oh god, just saying Mephisto's true name felt like such an intimate thing that Reign felt his cheeks turn pink and his heart to pound in his chest. ]

[open-ish] pain is supposed to heal with time

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writes u feelings

/gets wrecked

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