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ɴᴀᴛʜᴀ orbiters ❰ mod collective ❱ ([personal profile] natha) wrote in [community profile] nysalogs2018-04-09 07:55 pm
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( introlog #5 ) strangerer things

You have spent the last few days on Thesa Station, taking in the knowledge that your world is no more. Perhaps you've made some friends (or maybe an enemy or two). Either way, you aren't expected to spend all of your time on the Station. El Nysa needs you, after all, and you promised you'd help the planet thrive. Are you ready?

Submit an AC-eligible thread with a new character as a participant for 2 OLYMPIA REP POINTS OR 2 WYVER REP POINTS, respectively, HERE or HERE.

THESA STATION    
All refugees on the station are called to the hangar where a large-scale teleporter has been set up; everyone will be sent to the planet together. Simply step onto the space between the arrays and wait. Before they depart, all new refugees will be given a starter kit!

You may have heard about earlier technical difficulties, but don't worry. I promise everything is in perfect working order this time. I'd say I tested it myself, but since that's not exactly possible, you'll just have to trust me! (Please.)

The older refugees will also be there to guide you to ensure no one is left confused... or behind. Make sure you wait for them — I've been detecting something odd so I'll be having them meet you at the landing site. Good luck, refugees! Not that you'll be needing it or anything...

The arrays begin to hum and glow, quickly building into a brilliant wash of light. It creates a column that travels all the way from Thesa Station to the surface of El Nysa. With the night sky as a canvas, the beam can be seen all the way from Olympia and Wyver — a view that has the natives whispering of blessings.

As a sudden but beautiful aurora splays across the sky, the refugees down on the planet receive a message asking them to travel to the landing site — and warning them to prepare for what may come of the strange readings Zasere's gotten from the teleport itself.
ON A BEAM OF LIGHT    

Traveling through the light leaves the impression of blinding starlight, a strange sense of weightlessness, and a disorienting moment of total sensory deprivation. The radiance of your teleport hangs bright in the sky above you, a shimmering aurora that reflects off the calm waters below, visible for miles all around.

You've landed on a peninsula to the east of the South Outpost. There's little here — scattered trees on spring-barren plains, with a few overgrown, dilapidated structures poking out of the brush. All is quiet save for the keening of animals and the gentle lapping of waves against the shore. This lonely desolation is hardly the bustling cities and vibrant cultures you were promised back on the station...
BY CAMPFIRE'S GLOW. But waiting for you is a group of your predecessors, and with them, a veritable tent city, with portable stoves, coolers of food and drink, comfortable bedrolls, and cheerful rings of bonfires — all that you need to make merry of the night, courtesy of Overseer Voss, who has, thanks to his interest in blessed meteorological phenomena and refugees, decided to make a holy expedition of the affair.

Settle in, meet new comrades, and enjoy yourself, for you've safely completed your journey. But don't wander too far from the fires — the dark is closing in, and there's a strange, electric feeling in the air, the scent of ozone drifting on the breeze. And what were those odd readings Zasere mentioned?



A SHEPHERD OVER THE FLOCK. The spring sun dawns on a grey morning, already burning away the fog rolling in off the sea. It quickly becomes apparent that Voss and his entourage of acolytes have been up for hours, hard at work. They've set up a brightly-draped stage and a travel pulpit, magically enchanted to amplify his voice, and as the sun breaks over the horizon, Voss is all set to do what he does best: proselytize.

As our Goddess has sent Her blessing once before to herald the coming of those touched by Her light, so She has done once again! Here you see them, those surrounded by the light of our Goddess, each of them bearing the mark upon their skin of Her holiest of hands! Do you not see? Do none among you bear witness to the righteousness of Her message? Perhaps this is why our people have shamed themselves in front of our Goddess—

[ He continues for another 15 minutes... ]

Nevertheless. See you them before us now! See them as they are, coming to our gates with Her reminder, that these people must be treated with the utmost respect and care. Thesa's divinity is not to be treated with such flagrant disregard! Those who She chooses are not ours to use as mindless fodder, to hurt, to torture — shame upon those who allowed such deeds to shame us under Her watchful gaze!

To those of you who have just arrived here on our doorstep, be not afraid! The Temples of Thesa welcome you to our home with hearts and minds open! Should you ever find yourself in need of solace, seek out the Temples, as there are no greater allies to you than those of us within the Temple walls. You are welcome all to Olympia!


As he steps away from the enchanted podium, he can be heard saying aside to an acolyte, "How was that? Heavy on the shame, but I think it went well!" While he will not leave the area immediately, his acolytes will politely turn away attempts to speak with him and remind anyone interested that they can leave a message at the Temples.
CLOSE ENCOUNTERS    

Despite going off without hitch, the new refugees' arrival isn't entirely without incident. It seems that the "blessed" beam of light that brought the refugees down to El Nysa brought something else along with it — a sliver of the Storm. At least the beam was short enough that only a small fraction managed to squeeze through.

But it's enough to wreak a little havoc around the landing site and along the road back toward Olympia and Wyver — and even, for a few days, in the cities themselves.
THE TRUTH IS OUT THERE. The Storm is an undeniably destructive force, and that's proven with this small sliver's effect as it ripples across the continent. While there's no visible sign of its presence, strange phenomena soon begin to appear, corresponding with Zasere's odd readings.

They're innocuous little things at first. A sudden silence, animals going quiet, insects stilling. All technology, no matter how advanced, ceases working. You discover when you check with a friend, the clock on your phone is twelve minutes slow even though you'd swear only a minute had passed — time missing. Walking through the woods takes longer than it should when brushing past one bush leads to brushing past that same bush again — and again, and again, the area looping on itself. It keeps you trapped, going in circles for minutes, even hours, before finally releasing you in a random direction.

Or perhaps you'll feel a sense of deja vu, like you've walked down this road, taken this turn, seen that bird fly from this branch before. This is the second time that cat has crossed your path. The person you're meeting, you already know their name; you're certain you've already met.



WE GOT COWS. The Storm sliver also ushers in sudden, localized weather anomalies — heavy storms, blizzards, strong winds, and more. Affected areas range from just a few feet wide to nearly half a mile. One minute, the sky may be sunny and clear, but the next dark storm clouds roll in, unleashing torrential rain. Small tornadoes surge along the road, kicking up winds strong enough to knock people over and carry objects away. Hail hurtles down from the sky, but only in a ten foot radius. Temperatures fluctuate wildly between one extreme and the next, from heat waves to cold snaps. Soupy fog blankets the area, thick enough that you can barely see your hand in front of your face. Good luck finding your way!



FORGETTING IS SO LONG. The visions come on suddenly and with very little warning. One second, you're carrying on as normal — but the next, you blink and find yourself (and anyone near you) somewhere else completely. You may recognize this place as a moment from the past, one that you lived through. It's a memory, your memory, and it now replays around you in exceptional detail, unnervingly lifelike. Or you may not recognize it at all. It might belong to the person next to you, or to someone else entirely — a memory that the Storm has swallowed up.

Either way, the scene plays out just as it once did, and there's nothing you can do to stop it — or escape it. The memory surrounds you to no end: every door you open leads nowhere, every hallway you turn down continues on forever, every horizon you flee toward hangs just out of reach. And linger too long or turn the wrong corner, and you may find yourself abruptly stuck in a completely different memory. It's almost tempting, then, to give up, to let the past sweep you away...

But this isn't the full might of the Storm. Look closely, and you can see that in the walls of this trap, there are minute, hairline cracks, a facade of fractured glass. Imperfections in the memory where the real world is breaking through. It seems the only way to escape these memories is to find those cracks and break through them — by force, by will, or by some other method entirely.
DECISIONS, DECISIONS...    

The time is coming to make a choice — perhaps not a permanent choice, but unless you want to spend the rest of your nights out under the stars, you'll need to pick which city you will initially spend your time in. On the horizon, you will see that people have arrived to help you make that decision...
A FORK IN THE ROAD. Refugees and the hyper-religious wishing to hear Voss speak are not the only ones out and about under the light of the aurora. Citizens of both Olympia and Wyver have flocked to a point on the road midway between the cities and where the refugees have appeared, and they all have the same goal in mind: convincing the newcomers who have just descended in the blessed light of Thesa to come to their city and not the other.

They've come with bribes — that is, examples of what their cities have to offer. If you spent much time at the exhibition up on Thesa Station, you might recognize some of what's being shown off, though the offerings here are markedly more tangible, and shown off by hawkers wearing substantially fewer clothes.

A herd of pegasi accompanies the Olympians, while a line of flying serpents is stabled at a tent bearing Wyver colors. Refugees are given the chance to experience solo flights and are told that if they prove their loyalty, they may have the privilege of owning such fine beasts one day themselves. The Olympians have also brought couture clothing, jewelry, and makeup to offer a taste of Olympian splendor, while the Wyver delegation has brought along fine weapons, sense-enhancing jungle plants, and small vials of diluted dragon’s blood (drinking confers a temporary boost in strength) to demonstrate their might. The Olympians speak proudly of the glory of the Temples of Thesa; the Wyverns speak of the Volkkran Pact and inform newcomers that they can make a pilgrimage to the summit of Namarak Mountain at the next full moon.

This is as good a time as any to compare your plans with others around you and exchange contact information before going your separate ways with people who are going to the city you are not. When you’re ready to go, don’t worry about safe passage — the natives of each city will gladly escort you there in luxury.



OF WHITE AND GOLD. The people of Olympia are ecstatic that you’ve come to join them... So much so that they’ve prepared a grand tour of the city for the new arrivals. You will be introduced to the major businesses in the city, including businesses that they are proud to point out were founded by refugees.

Refugees who have been here for some time already are encouraged to pair up with newcomers to introduce them to the parts of the city they like best. To facilitate this, they’ve made arrangements with many of the business owners: new refugees who visit their shops (and older refugees who escort them) are given discounts!

Just a few examples of many: the Wyvernest offers free desserts to first time visitors with the purchase of a drink, refugees who visit the Silk Wyrms can have one custom (though not exceedingly expensive) outfit made for them for free, and visitors to Shades Darker are offered a half-hour session with one of the prostitutes at half price… or access to a private room, if they seem to have taken a shine to one of their companions on the tour.

Lastly, tour guides will point out that over the course of the next week, the train to Flona Cove will allow new refugees to board for free so that they can experience the seaside for themselves. With the weather finally starting to warm, this is as good a time as any for a visit to the beach, isn’t it?



OF RED AND BLACK. Life in Wyver is typically a sink-or-swim sort of experience — but in light of the valor recently displayed by their predecessors, the natives are now more willing to assist in getting newcomers settled. The entire journey here they have been talking up the virtues of their city… and now is the time to show everything that's on offer.

The well-known businesses in the city are prepared for the influx of newcomers. Some are giving out discounted samples of their products while others are offering a more hands-on experience: in exchange for working a few hours, they will give training in whatever task is being performed.

At the Forged, newcomers can learn the basics of crafting simple weapons (and take one of their successes home), while visitors to spas near the lagoons are trained in the art of massage. Those who wander to Falmi’s Ring can learn the art of pugilism or how to keep (and fix) books if they're more inclined to the gambling that goes on. Newcomers interested in Wyver's dragons can get hands-on experience at the Fields of the Exalted's nursery. While they walk from place to place, a guide may point out a job posting from Highwind Hires, noting that refugees can make a name for themselves outside official channels.

The last stop on the tour is the Undergrowth. The guides speak of the jungle in reverent tones and caution new refugees not to wander too far in. They warn never to explore alone, but also urge refugees to take time to familiarize themselves with it; after all, the jungle is an important part of life in Wyver, and those who are going to be living here should understand it as well as they do.
You've chosen your path, refugee, but that doesn't necessarily make it a permanent one. Watch out for the strange effects of the Storm, which linger still in the two cities and everywhere in between for the next few days before dissipating just as mysteriously as they came, but otherwise enjoy the welcome and make yourself at home — after all, this is home now.
FINAL OOC NOTES    
An AC-eligible thread with a new character as a participant for 2 REP POINTS FOR EITHER OLYMPIA OR WYVER may be submitted from this log. SUBMIT THE THREAD FOR OLYMPIA OR WYVER HERE AND HERE RESPECTIVELY BY APRIL 29th 11:59 PM EST.

We will no longer be providing overflow posts. In an event where the post hits CAPTCHA, players are advised to move threads to an overflow post on their character journals or create their own catch-all post. These threads remain eligible for AC, AC Rewards, and REP.

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sullenstallion: (62)

[personal profile] sullenstallion 2018-04-14 03:51 am (UTC)(link)
[Fuck this. Fuck whatever this is. Dylas is standing in the dream space for all of five seconds before he knows what he should be doing. This vision in front of him is horrible. He knows who that is, even if he's never met that child.

Someone has a needle, and Dylas roars as he surges forward, leaping high into the air and bringing his fist down against young Atsushi's tormentor. Just as he's about to connect, however, the scene changes to another one, one a few months later (not that he knows). His hand slams into the ground hard enough to make him wince, but he's quick to get back on his feet, tail lashing more mightily and furiously than it ever has.]


Let go of him, you bastards!

[He hasn't noticed Atsushi himself yet.]
gekkajuu: commissioned, please do not steal (寂しい島)

[personal profile] gekkajuu 2018-04-14 12:55 pm (UTC)(link)
[Strange how Atsushi ends up feeling, looking at his past. It registers as "numb"; it's more like "paralyzed", leaving him unable to so much as walk away. Even when Dylas appears on the scene like a stampeding horse, the complete disconnect doesn't strike Atsushi as odd.

But Dylas ends up hurting himself, which feels like he's being caught up in the memories somehow, and that is something Atsushi can't accept. Still, he doesn't move, almost a literal wallflower at this point.]


It's all right. [Words have never sounded as hollow as they do when Atsushi speaks up. He's not lying, though: this is what he needs to believe is the truth.] This happened a long time ago.
sullenstallion: (53)

[personal profile] sullenstallion 2018-04-15 04:54 am (UTC)(link)
It's not alright!

[The memories are causing Atsushi distress. He's hearing what his tiger friend is saying, but it fills him with so much frustration. He takes a defensive stance and yells; lightning bursts from his body in every direction except for Atsushi's. They hit 'walls' here or there. Nothing is actually being struck no matter how long Dylas stands there, trying the same thing.

He takes a knee to catch his breath.]


Why are they doing these things to you?
gekkajuu: commissioned, please do not steal (虚ろに空いた胸の隙間から)

[personal profile] gekkajuu 2018-04-15 08:42 am (UTC)(link)
[That is definitely the first time Atsushi has seen Dylas' lightning powers used so intensely - but even that barely registers. He needs to go to Dylas, but for the longest seconds of his life, he's not sure he's capable of movement anymore.

Then he moves anyway, slowly, and it's so strange that he can. He stands next to Dylas, just to be close. He's not sure touching would be a good idea, as if that would drag Dylas into the past with him.]


Because they hate me. [That's how simple it is, really.] Because of my ability, in part...

[Still, he doubts that anyone but the headmaster himself knew about that. The orphanage was terrible all around, and while the headmaster may have had his reasons, plenty of other kids were mistreated in there, if not to the same degree as Atsushi.]

Because it would teach me to be strong and survive in the outside world.
sullenstallion: (90)

[personal profile] sullenstallion 2018-04-15 09:00 am (UTC)(link)
[To hell with this. To hell with all of this. Dylas is seething with rage that anything would dare show Atsushi all of this again. What he's seeing doesn't really matter from his own perspective. It changes nothing about Atsushi himself, it only adds faces to Dylas' ever-growing list of people whose asses he needs to kick if they show up here.

To that end, he roughly grabs Atsushi's wrist once he's close. From there, he pulls his friend closer, and he shoves Atsushi into his chest once he can get a hand on Atsushi's back.

And he attempts to hold him there. He doesn't know what to do. But Atsushi doesn't need to watch all of this again. Dylas can protect him from that—]


That's bullshit. You're a badass furry. [Isn't that the name they'd decided for themselves back in the cave? He's not 100% sure.] Stay here. You don't have to look.
gekkajuu: commissioned, please do not steal (eatsushi025_zpsl088y94k)

[personal profile] gekkajuu 2018-04-15 10:11 am (UTC)(link)
[Atsushi wasn't aware of being tense, but pulled against Dylas' chest, he can't help realizing that he wasn't exactly relaxed, no matter how much he tried to be. Slowly, he tries to relax his body. Not seeing his memories again doesn't help much, this short term, but feeling Dylas and how Dylas is there for him does.]

It's okay, really. I've seen it all before already.

[That really doesn't make it any better - but it should. And maybe if he tells himself that enough, he'll believe it.]
sullenstallion: (69)

[personal profile] sullenstallion 2018-04-15 10:24 am (UTC)(link)
It's not okay. Just because you've seen it...

[He's sort of reminded of a while back when he'd muttered in his sleep. He still mutters in his sleep. Atsushi can come by any night of the week and listen at his door and he's sure to hear mumbling. He gave away part of himself without wanting to that day, to Atsushi. And it was fine. But this? This is all horrible. Atsushi obviously didn't want him to know about these things.

He grips Atsushi so tightly. There are tears stinging at his own eyes as he rests his head against Atsushi's. Dylas' tail is determined to set a record for angry lashing, and he finds himself grinding his feet into the floor. He's clopping in anger.]


What do you want me to do? Tell me. I want to help.
gekkajuu: commissioned, please do not steal (寂しい島)

[personal profile] gekkajuu 2018-04-16 07:42 am (UTC)(link)
[Of course it hurts, seeing these memories again, but Atsushi is used to it (or should be). It's far worse for Dylas, who's never seen them before and clearly can't help the righteous anger he feels.

It's that, more than anything else, that makes Atsushi's answer easy.]


... We should go. [Leave this place, leave the memories, somehow.] I don't think this is going to end if we stay here.

[Trust him, he's been here a while.]
sullenstallion: (88)

[personal profile] sullenstallion 2018-04-18 12:28 am (UTC)(link)
I want you to stand behind me.

[He lets go of Atsushi abruptly and turns around. One hand reaches back for Atsushi's and pulls it in front of himself where he can hold it. It'll be awkward to walk like this, but damn it. He's not letting this thing win.]

Grab my tail with your other hand so I can guide you...and keep your eyes closed. If I can't find a way out, I'll tear this place apart with my hands.

[He's expecting Atsushi to obey. He knows he's supposed to get better at asking, but he can handle this. Even as the memories flick to another torture that make Dylas' stomach flip, he'd rather have his eyes burned than put Atsushi through his again.]
gekkajuu: commissioned, please do not steal (虚ろに空いた胸の隙間から)

[personal profile] gekkajuu 2018-04-18 10:43 am (UTC)(link)
[For what it's worth, Atsushi doesn't mind Dylas ordering him around, considering the circumstances. If anything, it's a little welcome: it's easier to rely on Dylas that it could ever have been to rely on himself. So he does as instructed, very carefully grabbing Dylas' tail with his free hand. Only then does he close his eyes, taking a deep breath and releasing it.]

I'm ready.
sullenstallion: (23)

[personal profile] sullenstallion 2018-04-18 12:25 pm (UTC)(link)
[Okay, he knows he asked for that, but it still feels good.

How the hell is he supposed to find something in a room that keeps shifting, anyways? He studies the area, trying to concentrate. Atsushi is counting on him to get him out of here. He's a little embarrassed now that he has time to think about it; he must've looked like an idiot making all those demands and throwing lightning all over the place.]


This is stupid. Not you. Whatever...did this. Or whoever. I hope they like having their ass kicked.

[False bravado, probably. He starts moving toward one of the walls in the current vision and elbows it. Yep. That felt real. Destroying one of the walls isn't going to be an option.]
gekkajuu: commissioned, please do not steal (寂しい島)

[personal profile] gekkajuu 2018-04-19 06:32 pm (UTC)(link)
[Atsushi is incredibly calm by comparison. He was already resigned to his memories, for the most part. Even just closing his eyes is a massive improvement - and yet he wouldn't have done so without Dylas' instructions.

It really is nice, relying on Dylas this way. Maybe it's not right, and maybe it's not healthy, but Atsushi sure likes it.]


... Do you think this is like the hypnosis?
sullenstallion: (79)

[personal profile] sullenstallion 2018-04-20 10:40 am (UTC)(link)
Who cares?

[Leave it to Dylas to be blunt about it. He doesn't know anything about hypnosis except that it's something some monsters can do. He usually punches those monsters. That makes this situation all the more annoying. Why can't he fist his way out of this?]

It's unpleasant. There's...a man now. I don't like the way he looks.

[The scene had shifted again to some guy Dylas has obviously never seen in his life. He assumes it's just another tormentor, doesn't think it's special enough to draw more attention to. He keeps moving, trying to see if he can find something out of place.]
gekkajuu: commissioned, please do not steal (eatsushi079_zps29xrusvf)

[personal profile] gekkajuu 2018-04-20 01:38 pm (UTC)(link)
[You like fisting monsters, do you, Dylas?!]

... The orphanage headmaster.

[Atsushi doesn't have to see him to know it's him - or presume so, anyway - and he tenses up accordingly. Of all the people who tormented him in that place, the headmaster had always been the first and foremost.]

Keep walking. I don't want him to -...

[What, exactly? It's just a memory, isn't it? The man can't do anything to him anymore - but that's not how it feels.]
sullenstallion: (93)

[personal profile] sullenstallion 2018-04-20 01:57 pm (UTC)(link)
[The way Atsushi tenses behind makes Dylas sick to his stomach. Whatever they did to him, for whatever reason...it's all inexcusable. He hopes they all burn in hell now that they're gone.

He moves faster now, moving against a wall. He clicks his tongue in frustration. Why can't he find this faster? Why can't he protect Atsushi from this one thing?]


Don't let go of me. Hey. Do you remember that time we went to the beach with Daifuku? What did I make again?

[He made something tiger-shaped. He remembers, but he leaves it to Atsushi to search in his head for a single memory among what he hopes are even more happy memories. But after asking the question, he stops and squints at the wall. Something is different—the texture, the light isn't reflecting right, it's...cracked?

Without thinking about it, he slams his fist into the spot hard, with all the force he'd put into hitting that man over there if he were actually here.]
gekkajuu: commissioned, please do not steal (何処に向かうか)

[personal profile] gekkajuu 2018-04-21 08:23 am (UTC)(link)
[Atsushi isn't even doing that poorly - or so he thinks. Maybe he's just used to it, because Dylas' question makes him need to stop and think a lot longer than is probably healthy.]

... Mochi? You made daifuku mochi... with tiger faces on.

[Why does that seem distant enough to barely seem real, suddenly? Clearly the orphanage still has a tighter grip on Atsushi than he'd thought - or it's just the hypnosis that jumbled his barely-settled brain all over again.]

There were those watermelons, too...
sullenstallion: (93)

[personal profile] sullenstallion 2018-04-23 02:05 pm (UTC)(link)
[The silence is concerning. It takes all of Dylas' willpower not to turn around and start trying to awkwardly comforting Atsushi. He slams his body against the fractured space next, and then his elbow after that. Each time, he drags Atsushi with him, which creates distracting friction on his tail, but...]

Yeah. That's right. Prince is pretty great, isn't he?

[Think about Daifuku, the only noble in their household. With a loud grunt, Dylas pulls back his fist and slams it into the rapidly fracturing air in front of them. The vision ends as quickly as he'd been sucked into it—there's a rush of air, like of a sealed room being opened, and then Dylas is falling forward from the momentum of all the ramming and punching he'd been doing.

He lands face down in the grass of the path they'd been walking on.]
gekkajuu: commissioned, please do not steal (疾走れ 疾走れ)

[personal profile] gekkajuu 2018-04-23 06:50 pm (UTC)(link)
[Jeez, Dylas, save your tail-grinding for sexytimes?! Honestly.

Not that things don't end up close enough shortly after, when they're suddenly falling and Atsushi has the benefit of a relatively fluffy landing, right on top of Dylas. He was okay to follow along to Dylas' wild movements before, surrendering himself to Dylas because it was better than surrendering himself to his own fear; now, he's instantly snapped out of both, for the most part.

He should really get off Dylas, so he moves to get up.]


... Are you okay?
sullenstallion: (92)

[personal profile] sullenstallion 2018-04-23 11:38 pm (UTC)(link)
[IT'S NOT THAT.

At least Atsushi is light. Dylas scrambles as soon as he feels Atsushi standing up, springing to his feet, almost falling over, and then catching his balance. He dusts a few blades of grass off of his trousers and exhales a grunt before remembering the important thing here: they're out.

He turns to Atsushi.]


I feel like I'm the one who should be asking you that. But I'm fine. I'm...glad it's over.
gekkajuu: commissioned, please do not steal (eatsushi073_zpskszdjb3f)

[personal profile] gekkajuu 2018-04-24 07:55 pm (UTC)(link)
[Atsushi offers an awkward smile that's not even a little bit sincere. Yes, he supposes Dylas "should" be asking him that, instead, but that's not how it works. It's strange, but as much as Atsushi doesn't mind talking about his past, having someone actually see it feels vaguely embarrassing, and almost.... incriminating? It feels like, seeing his past, people might finally realize how useless he really is - and that's not realistic, he knows it's not, but it's hard not to feel that way.]

... So am I.

[What else can he say? He can't not talk about it, but he really doesn't want to talk about it, either.]

... You didn't hurt yourself falling, did you?