nysalogs | open | your name is on a lot of quotes in this book

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open | your name is on a lot of quotes in this book

Who: Claire Fraser (

nineteenfortyfive) & you
What: May things, lots of moping Claire... forgive me.
When: May
Where: Olympia
Warning(s): General Outlander warnings.

I. THE MARKET

[Her marriage is in an unpleasant place and she doesn't know how to fix it. Percy is in stasis. Ramsay is back. Theon was, for a brief moment, back in stasis as well, but only returned in a worse state than he was. It's been a lot to contend with on top of being so recently tortured (her her hands remain in gloves as her nails grow back, the last of the damage left), and one afternoon as Claire's in the market, standing before a fruit stand, it all catches up to her.

For someone who urges others to confide in someone, anyone, often herself, she doesn't follow her own advice.

She pushes other shoppers out of the way as she suddenly finds it hard to breathe, hard to keep her eyes from welling with tears, and if she slams into anyone there's no apology as she stumbles out and away.

She stops when she comes to a fountain, gasping and sobbing, a hand clutching at her neck as if there's something suffocating her, chest heaving rapidly. No, nothing physical, just an overwhelming sense of sadness. A sadness that turns into more of a frustrated panic as she tries to calm herself, leaning over the water.]

II. THE TRAIN/FLONA COVE

[Percy did have an affinity for water.

Claire knows she can't watch over Theon 24/7. He needs to stand on his own, and he can, and so Claire takes some hours for herself and heads to the beach. She's always enjoyed train rides. Perhaps she's even in the mood for conversation with whoever happens to sit by her.

At the beach, instead of collapsing on the sand and considering letting the waves wash her away, she takes a stroll, skirts tied up over her knees so she can walk in the small waves without getting drenched.

Now and then she stops to pick up a shell. By the end of it, she's got a hefty collection held in her skirt, and dumps her prizes where she's left her shoes.

Well. Now what to do with them?]

III. STASIS

[She spends more time here than she'd ever admit. She makes it sound like her visits are brief. They're not. On leave from the Sanctuary, she's had a lot of time to simply be.

Today, she stands before her daughter's pod. What she'd give to be able to touch her red hair, or at least feel her skin, make sure it's warm. All she can so is press her hands against the glass.]

Sometimes I think you're luckier, in there. Though you'd probably throw a fit at me saying that. I know you'd rather be here, too. I know.

[[ooc: pls choose your flavor of sad mom, or hit me with a wildcard! Oooooor send me a PM if you'd like me to whip up a starter, and I'd be happy to.]]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ He will admit that it took him some time when he crash landed here for him to find some level of normalcy. He did rely heavily on Ros' ring for a bit, but more and more he found himself going without the calming influence. He would have to find a way to get beyond what Randall did to him on his own. No one else could do that.

There's a hint of surprise when she leans up to kiss him like that. It's been a while. He responds with a smile and he leans down while drawing her closer. ]

Yer husband misses ye a wee bit himself.

[And she's been careful. She remembers those days after Wentworth, and how difficult it was for him. She feels pang of guilt for not being a more active presence with him here, knowing what she knows now.]

Only a wee bit, Jamie?

[ It's far easier to insist it's only a small amount. She doesn't need to become aware of how lonely he had become without his wife. He's never been fond of feeling helpless or that low. But in truth he had missed his wife dreadfully. It's been a rather long time if you counted the time he spent alone with Randall since he'd been in the arms of his wife this calmly. ]

Ye win. [ He smiles at her. ] I've never missed another soul so much in my life.

[It's not winning if she already knew the answer. She presses her lips to that smile of his before they move to his jaw, and then his neck.]

I'm back, now.

[ It's a weight being lifted off his shoulders to hold her now. To realize that they have found a way through everything before. They're not perfect and they never have been, but they love one another. It's something that they've always remembered. Even through dark moments like before.

That smile only grows as she continues to kiss him. She goes down to his neck and he hums his gratitude for a moment. ]

Ye are.

[ His hands go downward to get a grip of her bottom. He's happy to remind her that he's there as well. ]

[That grab makes Claire laugh. God, it's been too long.]

Some things never change.

[ Twenty years. Fifty years. A hundred years. None of it matters. He'll always want his wife. He can only hope that once she feels Theon can manage more on his own that he'll see her more often. Not simply just when they're climbing into bed or waking in the morn. ]

Ye've hardly let me do much touching. Ye had to ken this was coming.

I just wanted you to be sure.

[Wentworth, for him, wasn't all that long ago.]

[ Longer than he realizes. After the kidnapping and the memories he's damned tired of letting the past control him. Maybe his future isn't necessarily the brightest with their separation, but he reunites with her. It shows that he can keep going. Move forward. ]

Ye could've asked.

I'm sorry.

[It's true. Claire lets her hand wander over his side, over the spot where she knows the brand once was. A place she hasn't dared to touch until now.]

I've never wanted to push.

[In any direction, but... it happened.]

Ye've never pushed. Never even come close. I dinnae think ye ever could. When ye dinnae ask I simply assume ye dinnae desire it.

[ It's true though. Months ago he likely would not have been in the best position. But so much has happened here. Not to mention his many sessions with that ring. It's not long term Ros had said, but maybe it did more help than he thought. He's not completely himself, but he doesn't see Randall's face in place of his wife's when she touches him or kisses him. ]

I've never stopped desiring you.

[Steve Trevor had asked her if she perhaps only wanted friendship with Jamie. Most certainly not.]

I never will.

[ It did feel a little like that. He supposes she knows the feeling though due to their time in Paris she once told him of. But appearances can be deceiving can't they? ]

Ye havenae? [ He smiles a little. ] I'll have to be sure t' get that one in writing.

[ A soft chuckle. ]

I can do better than that. [She says, taking his good hand in both of hers.] Come to bed with me. Right now.

[His gift can wait, and so can Theon.]

[ The only reason he doesn't sweep her up and make a move is because he's not sure if he can really be selfish with her at this point. He's not sure. He doesn't want to keep her away. ]

I would absolutely love t'--[ He brushes the top of her shoulder with his other hand. Gesturing to her clothing. ]--peel these off of ye, but do ye nae need t' get back to the lad?

I do, but fifteen or twenty minutes more won't make a difference. He was sleeping, when I left. We can make it quick.

[If he doesn't mind.]

Sassenach, I dinnae think we've ever "made it quick".

[ He gives her a look, but he does consider it. He greatly does. He scans her body with that hungry look in his eyes. His breath leaves him in a stuttering sigh as he finally drags his eyes back up to her face. ]

No. If I'm t' get reacquainted with my wife I dinnae want time constraints. I want just ye and I in our bed for the remainder of the evening.

You, sir, have far too much self-control.

[She sees his point, but it doesn't stop her from sighing heavily and actually taking a step back so she doesn't jump his bones right then and there.]

Or I only want t' spend as long as I possibly can doing a whole manner of wicked things t' ye.

[ He gives her a smile. He doesn't follow her to close the small amount of distance. He knows if he did there would be absolutely no stopping him. ]

I dinnae think that's self control.

[She doubts he'll last as long as he'd like, but she knows better than to say that. So, she just smiles, daring to reach out and touch his arm. Distance didn't last long, did it?]

I love you, James Fraser.

[ That's rude, Claire. But the distance doesn't seem to last. Jamie lets the heat from her hand radiate up and through his arm. It runs through his body sending a smile to his face. He moves in towards her though without a real thought. He'll always want to be closer to his wife. ]

And I love ye, mo nighean donn. More than anything.

I know. We'll be all right, you and I. I promise.

[It's a promise she can keep.]

[ He knows that if he was to wind up with the memories of their future that they still have a ways to go. More than a few hurdles to overcome. He doesn't look forward to the grief that he'll have to endure, but it does make him happy to know they've come this far. They've yet to give up. ]

Do I still get my gift?

Greedy. [She teases, leaning in for a kiss. Oh, there's plenty to discuss, and much of it will hurt, but she's happy to enjoy the moment.]

Close your eyes.

Ye told me I could have my gift.

[ He's hardly greedy. He's giving up seeing her naked to wait for a moment when they have more time between them. He's given that up. He's certain he at least deserves to see the gift she originally promised.

There's a smile before Jamie shuts his eyes for her. ]

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