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Who: riza hawkeye (

strictdiscipline) & open!
What: a catchall, basically
When: all month
Where: oot 'n aboot
Warning(s): none yet, will update if necessary

I - SHADES DARKER

[ Work at Shades Darker, despite the customer base, is far more tame than she imagines. For the most part, she completes and files paperwork in the back, tidying up schedules and correcting small mistakes in wages for employees whose names she's slowly beginning to commit to memory.

But sometimes she's expected to put on a good face for the public, especially when information's needed, and so she treks outside to the streets, false modesty and cheer on her face as she flags down passersby. ]

Excuse me, we're looking to gather opinions for our next [ entirely made up, please don't kill me mods ] promotion. If you could take a look at these two photos—

[ At which point she hands over said photos. Both are very revealing, though of entirely different things. ]

Which do you prefer?

[ THE QUESTION: Are you a tits or an ass person, please respond truthfully. ]

[ ooc: feel free to assume some basic handwaved cr if your character also works there. ]

II - SHOOTING RANGE

[ Somewhere between Shades Darker and the gun range, her persona shifts. The polite smile drops from her face, her shoulders straighten, and her stride takes on an almost dangerous efficiency as she collects her equipment and heads out to the back. There's been little use for a firearm of any sort so far, her job now dealing with wealthy clientele rather than criminals, but she's hardly about to sit around and wait for the next emergency to occur.

She's a regular at the range, and if there's anything particularly notable about her, it's the way she never smiles after making a perfect shot (often) and makes less noise than the gun in her hands. It's obvious she means business, though less obvious just what exactly she's training for.

But if you're struggling, or you ask nicely, she'll offer a few tips here and there. ]

III - OUT AND ABOUT (FEAT. DOG)

A - [ Riza's not the only one that needs exercise. Twice a day she grabs the leash hanging by the door and takes Hayate out for a walk around the city blocks. For the most part, the walk's uneventful, halted by a cursory sniff here and an obligatory bark there.

But as it turns out, lengthy periods of stasis and an entirely new environment does no favors for anyone, least of all a dog still partly in the throes of puppyhood. Something - a squirrel, another animal, that tasty sandwich in your hand - catches Hayate's attention, and he bolts, pulling the leash out of Riza's hands as he darts towards the newest thing to catch his eye. ]

Hayate!

[ Better move quick, else there'll be a small dog getting all up in your business. ]

B - [ On her days off, and when he behaves, she takes Hayate out for a bonus walk, but not through the main city area. Instead, they turn off towards the nearest park, meandering until they find an unobtrusive spot by a tree. There, she runs him through drills - sit, lie down, stay, and come to name a few - careful to reward him after each trick accomplished. It's a surprisingly successful session up until the last trick: she lifts her hand and mock fires a gun, but instead of collapsing and rolling over, he merely wags his tail, tongue lolling out one side of his mouth.

Well, she tried. ]

IV - WILDCARD

[ ooc: you know the deal. write a prompt, or leave me a blank comment/comment with any prefs and i'll write you a custom starter! feel free to hit me up via PM or private plurk at speedforce to discuss anything. ]

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[Patrolling the spot as a Royal Guardsman lands him in questionable situations almost nightly. They range from cases of prostitutes with sticky fingers to herding the drunks into a direction indicative of where their home (or friends) may be. Tonight's first encounter is more of the benign variety. He stops abruptly, regards the pictures with indifference, then levels his gaze with Riza's.]

Aren't they the same thing?

[A nakedish girl.]

[ How did Keith get onto the Royal Guard without a useful pair of eyes, what was Ashti thinking. There's clearly a difference between the two pictures??

She looks down, making sure she hasn't actually pulled out two of the same picture (she hasn't), then looks back up at Keith. Well, if he's going to answer like that: ]

So you like both equally?

[ That's what she's going to assume now, thanks. ]

[This is almost as bad as that time he and Lance volunteered to help fill out a dating questionnaire. The questions are baffling, simple as they may be.]

Uhm, [Looking between the two, then up at her...trying to find some important correlation.The women pictured don't appear to look anything like her, so he's decided he can't really offend...] not...exactly. The pictures came out...fine, though.

[Which isn't quite what she's asking, but it's better than nothing?]

[ Is he an alien? Is he a pod person? Did he grow up in a monastery before this? Is he just gay?

All questions swirling around in her head as she tries to figure out how best to word any subsequent questions so that she'll actually get a straightforward answer out of him. (Except not really, because she has no idea what a pod person is.)

Don't all boys of his age have an interest in this sort of thing? ]

Only fine? [ She can work with that, at least. ] What would you suggest as improvement then?

[ The answer better not be "to put on more clothes". ]

[Oh god, is this like a Spot the Difference game? Maybe it's a trick question? Maybe he shouldn't even be judging -- these girls don't look incredibly old.

There's a sigh -- a thoughtful one. An intake of breath one might expect from an athlete about to run a 10k.]

This one, [Motioning to the T picture.] could probably use a shirt.

[In turn, his head tilts slightly at the A pic.]

Is this supposed to be an advertisement for girls' underwear?

[There's no writing, he can't tell. If so, the pictures are great.]

[ Is it really that difficult to answer a simple question? Are all millenials nowadays really so indecisive? Truly, the world is heading a dark direction.

His answers, useless though they are, are duly noted, her expression never changing. (Which is really a credit to her ability to keep it together, especially in the face of that last question.) ]

It wasn't intended to be, but I'm sure I could speak with our in-house tailor, if your girlfriend would be interested.

[ Or.....him, if he's into that. She doesn't know?? ]

[His face contorts as though she'd said the most absurd thing possible. Girlfriend? In-house tailor? He's shaking his head, hands splayed out in front of himself in physical denial...]

I don't -- have one. I thought that was part of your survey, that's all.

[yikes.gif.]

[ Oh. Well then.

He's not bad-looking, for the average teenage boy. Maybe he really isn't interested in girls and she should try a different approach. Her head tilts slightly to the left, curiosity not quite so feigned this time. ]

Is there a boyfriend then? Our tailor does menswear too.

[ Koralle would be so proud of her, trying to be inclusive. ]

[She's suddenly regarded with the owliest of eyes, there's a physical, if slight, recoil that occurs as well.]

Why would you even ask that?!

[It's not the most heinous of things he could ever be accused of having, but to Keith, anything love-related is something of a mystery. He's been deprived of even the most paternal iterations of it (with a few exceptions), but he's totally acting like Riza's just accused him of harboring terrorists.]

[ She's clearly hit some sort of nerve there, and it's enough of a hit that her curiosity sharpens. Either he is interested in members of the same gender, or he's incredibly incompetent when it comes to anything relating to love and romance. ]

I've been told to keep an open mind. Shades Darker doesn't discriminate against anyone's sexual preferences.

[ She might be narrating a TV commercial for how well-practiced it sounds. The follow-up's more genuine at least. ]

Though I apologize if I've offended you in any way.

[Why can't we have both....]

Those are both girls?!

[He thinks, which is probably besides the point; the ass picture...m...aybe? Could be a guy? It's 20## after all, but they both seem to be girls posing for whatever thing.]

I'm -- you're not-?

[He probably has a job to get back to. Patrolling. More like wandering about aimlessly until things like this fall into his lap.]

[ That's true, both is always a good option. OK, both it is. ]

Would you like pictures of men? [ Baring their butts and manboobs. ] I'm sure I have some of those as well.

[ He can even keep them, if he wants. ]

No!

[His hands drop; he's completely embarrassed now, regarding her sternly. Feel free to overlook the reddish tinge across his face.]

Why do you just have things like that?!

[ Did he miss her explanations the first few times? Honestly, she'd thought she'd made that pretty clear. Then again, he had missed all the other warning signs. ]

Because [ patiently, deliberately ] we're having a promotion, and because we cater to all interests and preferences.

[ There, she's spelled it out all nicely for him, surely he'll get it now. Though keeping her composure is starting to wear on her, and she sighs. ]

If it makes you feel any better, these pictures are strictly for work purposes only.

[Listen, no one's sat down with him to have The Talk yet. Anything that gets said to him, scenery and circumstances not withstanding, will be henceforth met with nothing less than complete discomfort and histrionics.]

Oh, you think -- [He motions to himself, then toward Shades Darker...and proceeds to shake his head. No...nnno...he's just passing through, not trying to dip in.] I don't want anything like that -- or to buy those.

[Which is what he thinks she's implying. Work purposes? Heck.]

[ His answer's probably for the best; the models would swarm upon him like a vulture and then there'd be nothing left. And for all her gentle hassling, he seems like a well-meaning enough person that she should probably allow him his self-comfort back. ]

Well, if you ever decide to change your mind, you're welcome to stop by. [ And, to be polite, she sticks out a hand. ] Riza Hawkeye.

[ She's cootie-free, promise. ]

Uh huh...

[That offer's wasted on him, predictably, but how nice of her to invite him in spite of his overarching ignorance.]

Keith.

[He'll take her hand in turn, offer a light squeeze. He's been civilized enough in that respect....]

[ What a good kid. Maybe he's not all that bad, even though he seems to have no idea how the human race repopulates itself. ]

If you ever change your mind, you're welcome to contact me.

[ She'll even tell everyone to go easy on him. ]

[On the other hand, sensei, you seem knowledgeable.

On the other hand, there's a start of a question. He stops, sighs, looks to the side, then settles back on her.]

Fine.

[Another glance to the side.]

If I do, it probably won't be about those pictures.

[No offense. This is her sole chance to change her mind.]

[ Nope, mind not changed. Bring it on, Keith. But, hmm, what else would he even ask about? ]

I'm afraid I don't have suggestions on how to obtain a boyfriend or a girlfriend, if that's what you're looking for.

That has nothing to do with it!

[Professionally speaking, maybe they should keep in touch if she's some kinda spokesperson for this place. You know. Crazy stuff going down every day, ha ha...]

[ Just kidding, just kidding. She'll stop hassling him now. ]

Alright, understood. [ And to affirm that point, her expression turns serious again. ] Feel free to contact me any time. I'll find the time.

[ About both sketcho and non-sketcho stuff. ]

[What a bully, and yet, they're suddenly at Social Rink Five.]

...Thanks.

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