[open] A D&D Extravaganza!

[rhygret]

Who: Rhys (rhygret) & everyone!
What: Bunkers & Badasses aka D&D!
When: Oct 7th
Where: A DARK AND MYSTERIOUS TAVERN aka it's an often-empty drink hall somewhere in town.
Warning(s): role-playing with elves on top of tables it's a gen log I swear


Welcome to Bunkers & Badasses!
This post will be broken up into 3 sections so that it's not just one giant wall of text with gifs:

The Meet & Greet will be for all your general mingling, arrivals, drinking, trolling, and B&B character introductions.

The Hook will be Rhys's start to the adventure where your characters begin playing as their characters and yes, it's as nerdy as it sounds. Goof off as much as you want here!

The Adventure will be the meat of the campaign where...basically anything you want happens! Combat, seduction, critical fails...all from the safety of your nerd dungeon. Want to fight a dragon? A band of orcs? SENTIENT ROCKS? This is where you want to be.

Wildcard: That said, you don't need to just use these prompts! You are free to make your own headers and starters at any time with stuff that may or may not be related to any of the above. You also don't need to reply to any of the above as a direct response; you can use them to launch your own prompts in those sections if you'd like!

Again, knowledge of how to play D&D isn't necessary. This is for fun and very bare-bones, so most of what Rhys will be doing is telling you how the environment/NPCs/monsters react to what your guys' character do! And also what they do themselves ICly...OOCly god that's going to get confusing. Basically just HAVE FUN, fake your rolls, cheat, threadhop, create your own starters, go wild! There is no established tagging order and I'll have Rhys drop into threads as necessary.

This post is open to anyone and everyone and you don't need to have responded to his IC post in order to play. Just tag in and have fun! The original OOC post can be found here!

As a note my timezone is JST and it's a little wonky, so feel free to just boomerang away and I'll do my very best to keep up! I'm posting this a bit early but I'll be around after a quick trip to the vet.

Comments

[rhygret]

Oh! Right, let me just... [ check his notes really quick, and then pipe up: ]

--Yes! Add your strength modifier--that tiny number again--and tell me what kind of damage it is! Slashing, piercing... I mean Im pretty sureit's slashing since it's an axe, but.

[zephrah]

Oh, okay! [ JUST A SECOND THERE ARE SO MANY NUMBERS. ]

So it's the 3, right? Not the 18? The 18 is what it is and the three is the other number?

[ A second squint at her weapon things. ] There's an S on there so I guess it's the slashing?

[rhygret]

That's the one! And yup, slashing damage.

[ Rhys nods and grins a little, glad that finally--finally, someone is actually playing the game with him. He's going to give this girl a goddamn pegasus or something. ]

How's your total?

[zephrah]

What? Oh!

[ Right, adding up numbers! That's important! ]

Um, fourteen of the slashing? I think?

[rhygret]

Nice hit! Man, that's a lot for a level one... Holy crap. Uhh. Okay! Sooo...bonus round complete.

The strange creature reels back with a roar of outrage when you attack. You swing your axe, and taken by surprise it is unable to dodge as your axe leaves a great gash across its broad chest. Purple ichor rises from the wound, but stems quickly.

It yells. "Insolent mortal! You dare attack a Voidsworn??" And then brandishing its weapon it turns on the party!

I'm gonna need you to roll initiative for the regular attacking order.

[zephrah]

[ TWO HANDED GREAT AXE, MOTHERFUCKER, EAT IT. Keyleth lets out her own Grog-esque bellow of outrage, then glances down at her sheet. ]

Is that this number? And the same dice I just used?

[ She rolls it, and immediately winces. That is not a very high number. ]

...Ummmmm...eleven?

[rhygret]

Okay, eleven...he rolled an eighteen and everyone else has [ WHATEVER NUMBERS THEY ROLLED HERE. let's pretend voidy goes first. ]

Right--the Voidsworn goes first and it is going to target Grog who took an attack of opportunity against it. He's going to raise his unholy blade above his head and bring it down in a slashing motion against Grog with aaaa...16 versus AC? That's the number by your armour.

[zephrah]

Jennifer! Jennifer the Barbarian! I'm just channeling Grog Strongjaw as inspiration.

[ Anyway. Keyleth peers at her sheet until she finds the right number. ] Oh. 15? [ YUP that hits. ]

[rhygret]

Oh--right, sorry. Jennifer. [ He's got so many people and characters to keep track of right now it's insane )8 but he's trying! ]

Unfortunately that's going to be a hit, and for damage...ooh, ouch. Uh. That's nine...damage.

[ which doesn't seem like a lot until you remember that EVERYONE HERE IS LEVEL ONE AND THAT'S ALMOST ALL YOUR HP IN 5E ]

[heraldsdawn]

[ Holy Shit, Rhys they are level one are you trying to kill them. Sen is just staring at this all from his side of the camera and oh shit oh shit. ]

I rolled a 14 for my Initiative, so I go next, yes? If that's the case I'm going to cast a spell on him. It's called-

[ He has to take a moment to look at his sheet give him a sec;]

Charm person.

Ven is going to make him their friend so he doesn't kill Jennifer. So Voidsworn has to roll a wisdom saving throw against....a dc...fourteen? Yes, fourteen.

[rhygret]

[ he wasn't trying to kill Jennifer okay THE DICE ARE THE MASTER HERE. Rhys is just the instrument through which they act or something poetic like that and he does feel bad for that roll. It was unlucky )8

That said even if he did get her to zero hit points there's still stuff that can be done--like Lavellan's interjection, which Rhys welcomes. ]

Right, okay since you're attacking it then it'll have advantage on that. [ Rhys drops the die twice, and whistles. ] But apparently he really sucks at wisdom, wow. A 4 and a 10--consider this Voidsworn charmed?? It uh, stops in the wake of it's attack on Jennifer and takes pause. Then it recoils back and exclaims,

"Oh, my! Well that was rather rude of me wasn't it? Please--forgive me. Always did like to just go for the throat like that. How's your blood? Not too much outside of your body?"

[zephrah]

Nine? That doesn't sound so--oh.

[ NEVERMIND. IT DOES SOUND BAD WHEN YOU LOOK AT YOUR TOTAL. ]

Wait! Wait, if I'm raging, I think I take half the amount of damage!

[ So, you know, not quite as Innards All Over The Floor as she could be. Poor Jennifer. The life of the tank is hard.

She also has no idea what to do with the thing she was hitting suddenly talking to her and being all nice. ]

Do I--Sen! Er, Ven! Do I keep hitting him??

[heraldsdawn]

[ If only things in life were this easy. He gives a glance to Keyleth through his screen at the question and quickly shakes his head. ]

No, no he's our friend.

For the next hour. So don't hit him before that time's up or he will hurt us.

Speaking of...

[ Looking back at you Rhys; ]

So, why don't you tell us what exactly is going on here?

[rhygret]

Is that to me, or--probably the monster yeah? Okay. So! Since you aren't attacking him he definitely stays charmed and answers easily:

"Well I was going to take great joy in ending the lives of your little band of heroes but that just wouldn't be good hosting now would it? After all it gets terribly lonely here, guarding this old castle. It's so rare I get visits from dear, delicious-looking friends like you. Not that I'm going to eat you anymore of course, no no."

He's having a good laugh at his own sort of demon-y jokes.

[zephrah]

...Okay, so we're just talking now? Jennifer's not so hot on the talking. [ SHE HAS AN INTELLIGENCE OF SIX AND SHE DOES NOT KNOW WHAT SHE'S DOING. ] She's gonna stand behind her small smart friend while he talks, holding her bloody axe and scowling and wait for there to be something to hit.

[heraldsdawn]

"Huh. I see.

Well...that's nice. "
[ Thankfully, he has an intelligence of 18 so...he can devise something. ]

Ven is definitely not comfortable with keeping this guy around if he's clearly beyond redemption so...I Have a plan.

"Say, friend. Where is the highest point in the castle? Can you take us there? Specifically a balcony."

whispers its a manor

[rhygret]

The Voidsworn looks pretty pleased and goes, "But of course. Anything for my good friends. Are you here to see Master Assquez? He has been expecting company." And you remember that Assquez is the name of that Lord who owns this manor, the one who's been refusing to help the people while they suffer.

Remember, this thing is charmed and thinks of you guys as its good friends so it'll pretty much do anything you want for the hour. He's going to turn and motion towards the large sweeping staircase which leads up to the building.

[zephrah]

[ Keyleth has to stifle a giggle (and does not do a very good job of it). ]

Heh. Assquez.

[ Consider it in character. Intelligence of six. That's hilarious. ]

Uh...Sen, uh, Ven, should we make him take us to Lord Assqueef?

[heraldsdawn]

[ Rhys has so much maturity. Really? Assquez?

Regardless- ]

Uh yes actually I think we would like to see the Master of the house first before we go to that balcony. Take us to him.

[They'll have to throw this guy off a balcony later. Gotta deal with the actual fantasy threat. ]

[rhygret]

[ If you had to deal with Vasquez ruining your life while constantly undermining your attempts to reach the top of the corporate ladder, you'd call him Assquez too Senren!! And sure, Vasquez may have been shot through the chest and then subsequently exploded but Rhys is allowed to be as petty as he wants after the fact okay ]

Okay! He's pretty amendable to that so the Voidsworn will make a flourishing gesture to welcome you to the manor of his master Lord Assquez and lead them up the sweeping staircase to the front door. He'll hold it open for you, Jennifer, but when you try to walk past him he actually stops you like a thought's suddenly occurred to him.

"Oh--hold on a moment friend. Forgot about all the traps! Just a moment now."

And he'll make this gesture in the air with his hand? So that a bunch of arrows come shooting across the main foyer where you would have stepped had he let you.

"Set all these up to kill you! Haha, nearly forgot about all that. Come along now!"

[zephrah]

Sen, I just want you to know, this spell never works this good when I try to use it in real life.

[ Let's all just. Observe the ridiculousness of that statement for a minute.


Okay, moving on. Keyleth clears her throat and puts on her gruff Jennifer voice again.]

"A-HEM-HEM. So, like, are there any other servants of Master Assqueef who, like, maybe didn't get the memo about us friends of his coming around to pay a visit and who might try to kill us? Like you did before, uh...you remember better?"

ASSQEEF

[rhygret]

[ No seriously. Assqueef, oh my god. Rhys actually snorts and looks at Keyleth in delighted surprise and decides right then and there: this is the woman he would marry if he were cooler, and she actually interested. She is perfection incarnate. ]

H-haha! Haa, ahem.

"Oh, yes. We have amassed quite the gather to be rid of you and your band of adventurers. Master Assquez had m-made it clear no one is to disturb the ritual."

[heraldsdawn]

Really? Because normally when this kind of blood magic is used it mostly, always works but it always leads to something more disastrous. Demons, temples exploding.

[ Because this definitely seems like blood magic. Not that he's going to complain right now since this is fictional blood magic. Not real blood magic. Sorry Kiki did he just bring on a mood killer?

He gives a look to Rhys through the screen that almost seems to read the other's mind on his thoughts.

Rhys definitely had a weird thing about elves.

Wait ritual? ]

"What do you mean ritual? What exactly does it entail?"