nysalogs | (open) back to ordinary

Entry tags:

(open) back to ordinary

Who: mikazuki augus (

sparsity) & various & you!
What: october plot - open prompts, closed starters.
When: various days in october.
Where: olympia & thesa.
Warning(s): violence, probably murder.

I. YOU'VE GROWN OUT OF US

[ All things considered, the events leading up to Olympia's current state are familiar in the way the lay of a skeleton is familiar, flesh stripped from bone, the impression of something once whole. Bare joints exposed, a working order, if not quite... right. Explosions rocking a populated area, terrified people, dubious claims opening up a chasm of blame for anyone free to explore. It leaves too much to people he doesn't trust. Too much like the colonies he saw falsely accused.

Years ago and yet fresh again, for all the subtleties he doesn't understand about it. All he knows is that people are ready to fight.

Mikazuki isn't really the vigilante sort, though he's moving through the streets of Olympia like he is, eyes trained and alert as he glances down alleyways he passes, storefronts and establishments a little too dark. He's most familiar with the marketplace, as much as he's a familiar face there too. All its corners have been thrown with smoke, illness, and shadow. Electricity is in the air, the same sort after the announcement. Mikazuki tastes it as he rounds the bars he knows, looking no where near old enough to enter one and now not marked by Ashti's stone or uniform to signify he's patrolling them, instead dressed in somber neutrals.

His pace only slows when he comes across one of the posters strewn about the city, wide things pasted sideways to the front of a building. Broad daylight, people around, hunters, accomplices. None of that matters. Only the face on it matters, a boy no older than himself, blocky angles and friendly eyes.

Reaching up, he scrapes his nails across its topmost edge and tears it off, crumpling the pieces in his palms. To anyone within earshot that may have stopped in light of his display, he passes a glance to. ]

What?

[ Polite, as always. ]

II. AND YOU'VE BEEN DYING TO GO

[ Every so often, the liveliness of Olympia drives Mikazuki to space. Not because of the noise, but because the conflict this time isn't his noise. It's not Tekkadan, not their conflict, save for those here with him now in the crossfire again. That's the only loyalty he owes, the only allegiance he has. Except this one thing.

Show us we can trust you.

Those words shadow his footsteps as he makes his way through Thesa and into the hangar, the chilly smell of alloy and fuel stinging pleasantly in his nose. He knows his way by heart now, just like he knows his way by heart through the stasis units on Alria to the one he visits day after day. It's quiet up here, compared to the surface below. There's an odd shuttle that takes off or docks in a whir of hydraulics, the natural shift and boom of metal, even at rest. But it's not any of the mass produced training machines that he's focused on as his footsteps thud across the catwalk lining the hangar perimeter, secured in front of the mobile suits. No, it's farther down that he focuses on, where the makes of suits starts to shift. Eventually, he slows next to a hulking white machine, crowned and clawed in gold. ]

Sleeping like usual. [ With no one else around him, he's actually addressing the suit. Hands in pockets, his gaze travels up and up, settling on its clean, quiet face plate. Repaired from that moment he was brought, breathing, to Thesa. ] I wonder what you'd want to do about this, too.

[ ...if there was any doubt that he's legitimately talking to a robot. ]

(ooc. closed starters below, if you'd like something specific feel free to hit me up here, rivalry, or axia#4656!)

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ He'd meant well.

That's the part that sucks. Even though people outside of their circle might not believe him, he'd honestly thought that he was helping. That man had taken advantage of him and his partner. They'd both needed money but they'd also had an interest in protecting the people around them. Now, because of his bad choice, people were sick and his family was in chaos trying to keep him safe. This wasn't fair. Not to him, but even less to them.

They've insisted his safety is priority, but are they seeing clearly? Shino's not perceptive, but he can have a good view of a situation when he needs to. He doesn't love himself as much as his family does and he loves them more than they love themselves. It puts them at odds here when he feels like the best choice is to go.

Facing Yamagi has been one of the worst parts of it. A second chance and he's already blowing it at making him anything but miserable, isn't he? He's let him down again. He took away his simple peace by making another rash decision. Now they're stuck hiding out like scared rats again, all because of him.

It's too much. He's got voices in his ears that won't shut up and the tense presence of his house is pushing all the energy out of his limbs. The usually chatty Shino has been shut up more than he's ever been since they got here. He's trying to play normal as he always does, but the disingenuous nature of his attempts is running out between his teeth when he does decide to pipe up.

He keeps finding himself in this bedroom by himself, trying to make himself scarce until the time comes when he needs to make a move once and for all. He trusts himself less than ever to make a decisive action. Sitting on the floor in the dark like he right now feels even worse than doing nothing. It's all he has the energy to do, though, so he swallows his pride and submits to his own slumped position.

This is far more than he bet on. ]

[His latest trip to Thesa has taken longer than what Yamagi's calculated in his mad dash to salvage what little security he has. There's no lingering by the pods for goodmornings and goodnights. He thinks he ought to retain some remainder of guilt for pushing the static well being of his family to the very back of his mind for the time being. Then again, what the old man and his people are blissfully unaware of in their sleep, won't hurt them.

He carries back food pouches this time, liquid protein and energy drinks and cold, distilled coffee to be consumed with little fuss and energy. Whether they're meant to console the listless, he can't really say. He knows from experience how forcing one to push nourishment between dry, bitter lips is akin to placating a miserable child.

He's been that miserable child himself time and again.

As long as he keeps moving, he reminds himself, letting his legs follow the memory of his body to its destination, he can keep on living.

As long as he has something to live for, they'll survive this.

The darkness of the room doesn't surprise him when he asks after Shino; he's found Ride in that position in the early years of their "exile". Back then, none of them have had the sensitivity to reach out to the bruised kid. None of them were Orga. He feels overwhelmed once more as his feet get heavier with every step into the room, two raps on the wooden frame to get Shino's attention.]

I brought something back to keep your strength up. [Heavens knows how well Shino's been eating ever since the news started eating at them]

It's much nicer than the stuff we had back on Mars. You'll be begging me for more in no time.

[Every teasing word is a celebration and a thanks that Shino's still here, despite everything.]

[ Yamagi coming back is relief even though his body still feels tense. He hears his footsteps approach. He's heard them so many times at home, he still knows the pace of his gait. It hasn't changed that much in the past five years, huh? It's just a little more confident now.

His head doesn't lift until Yamagi gets close and speaks. He looks up at him in the dark, eyes adjusted to it from his time in here. ]

Haha, it's that good? I'll believe it when I taste it.

[ There's no appetite in him, but the desire to placate Yamagi, in turn, is strong. ]

You can't be picker than I am. You'll like it.

[Adjusting the light just so it's above dim, he supposes it enough to not disturb Shino's peace, and enough for him to navigate the small space between.

He deposits the innocuous bag next to Shino with the same care he's afforded to the less perishable items, all lead and metal, tucked out of sight for the time being. He doesn't tell Shino about smuggling out those. He doesn't need to know, for the time being. He doesn't need to know about the increasing posters, either, or the word of mouth of intensifying sickness.

For now, all he needs to know that Yamagi's by his side, literally, then, as he slides down to sit beside him. ]

Let's get something in you, then. Don't make me go all Takaki on you. I don't know how he manages it day to day.

Yeah. I trust you on it, don't worry.

[ He's making a point to trust Yamagi on nearly everything. He and Eugene always seem to have his best interests in mind. He straightens his posture and tries to look 'alright' as Yamagi slides down to sit by his side.

Shino lifts a hand and puts it on Yamagi's hair, unable to ruffle it like before but still able to pat his head gently. ]

You don't have Takaki's bedside manner, Yamagi, you ain't gonna get too far if you don't do it your own way.

Good for me, then, isn't it? Being Takaki would be the death of me.

[Shino's large, playful hand has always been able to render him young, if not carefree, once more. The warmth lingers and he doesn't have the heart to protest it. Not that he wants to.]

It's not like I'm getting too far as it is. You've clamped up ever since we moved here.

[He tilts his head up at Shino just enough so as not to dislodge the comforting presence of his hand.]

And I don't know how to be anything else.

I think it'd be the death of anyone. I don't even got that kinda patience.

[ And he's pretty even-tempered when he doesn't have reason to be hot-blooded. He's the saint of Tekkadan, they just never had the words to anoint him properly. ]

Ah... m'sorry. Just-- y'know, haven't been very hungry.

[ He still isn't. He averts his gaze, looking somewhere off to Yamagi's right instead of his face. His stomach turns in him when he thinks too much about everything. ]

That's good. We need you to be you.

You haven't been sleepy, either?

[Even without the tell tale signs of sleep deprivation, Yamagi has never been away from the other boy long enough to not notice. Their bodies, evolved to conserve energy and weather the harsh atmosphere of Mars, could withstand long bouts of hunger and fatigue. Shino's always been one of the more physically resilient out of them.

And his mind was pulling him apart.]

I know it's not fun being cooped up in here. We... We had to be on the run ourselves for a while, back then.

[He's danced around this topic long enough, but Yamagi's never been a convincing liar. Perhaps it's about time the other shoe dropped.]

No... not really.

[ He hasn't been much of anything. It's like everything in him is running on auxiliary power. He's been in a haze at best, but he's trying to push forward. ]

You did? Really?

[ He turns his head and realizes quickly he's failed to hide his concern about it. He's been afraid to ask too many questions about after what happened. ]

[He supposes it's fair to skip the immediate aftermath; the sky bleeding over them, a harbinger of their fate as their world collapsed in thunder. There's no need to tell Shino of how they've shed their uniforms, their very own identity, as they scrambled into safety and scrubbed everything that's made them Tekkadan.]

After Tekkadan was no more, it still wasn't safe to be associated with the group. Our faces and names were publicized for a while.

[His fake ID still rests in the back pocket of his pants, the plastic pliant and warm in his hand, bearing a neutral expression and impersonal details. Tohru Eliot is printed in faded letters, a hasty inspiration from his parents' first names.]

We had to get these when we were finally out of hiding. Our names were never cleared so we couldn't get work anywhere. Zach had tried for a while--Did you know his old man works for an actual company?--but even he couldn't get us jobs with Gjallahorn breathing down everyone's necks. Kudelia came through, eventually, once she was in office. She's pulled some strings so life's gotten easier for us, but it wasn't easy at all, at first. Nothing was easy for a long time.

[The manhunts and the vandalism and the hiding hiding hiding. It's enough to break anyone's spirit in the heels of a grave loss.]

I'm sorry. I'm rambling again, aren't I...

[ Listening to Yamagi feels like swallowing stones. All the details he missed out on sink to the bottom of his stomach and make him feel heavy. This could have been avoided. If he was better, the outcome for all of them could have been so much better.

He can't think of anything to say, so he listens, quiet but staring at him with intensity. His mouth his tight. His shoulders are straight. He has to remember every word of it. He has to take it all in and do better... somehow...

His gaze shifts to the card and he looks it over. He can't read anything on it, but its presence feels foreboding. ]

No... no, you're not. I just-- I'm sorry, Yamagi. I'm so sorry. Because of me-- what I did-- you're stuck living like that again.

I don't want you to apologize for something out of your control.

[Yamagi's tone is direct and blunt as it's always been, malice never having a place in it whenever he's trying to get a point across.]

What's done is done. You've screwed up and every one of us is going to screw up in the future. We'll just keep on living. Whatever we're going through right now doesn't hold a candle to our brief hell back on Mars. Everyone's alive--isn't that great? They're safe in their pods... Which is more than I can say for everyone we've lost back then.

[He's rambling again and his hand trembles slightly, naked without its glove as it rests on Shino's cheek. He's glad for it, fingertips brushing along the faint scruff at his chin and jawline. He directs Shino's furtive gaze to his own.]

I don't need your regrets. I need you to be strong again. For me.

I could've said no, though. I let that guy trick me. I thought I was stopping an attack on this place, but I just helped out those assholes.

[ He wants to just keep listening. Yamagi's trying to hard to comfort him right now, but he just feels compounded guilt. Like maybe he's no good for Tekkadan. Like maybe things would be better if he just didn't come back if things will be this way with him around. He brings his hand up and cups it over Yamagi's, only looking at him because he's being held in place. ]

After all this, how can you need me at all?

[Being tricked by people with less scruples than themselves has been their doctrine before. History does repeat itself when there is everything to lose, and equally, everything more to gain.

Life's always been more vibrant for them with everything more to gain.]

Don't you get it? I've never given up on you.

[The look in his eyes is unguarded for once, sheer want, his smile both a tremble and trick of the dim light.

Perhaps he does need to nag Shino to shave as much as eat, the thought is quick and brief in his head when he seals Shino's lips with his own, the slight prickle grazing the side of his mouth as he brings their heads closer. It's not the chaste peck from before, innocent and affectionate. There's little innocence in this at all, down to how partly wishes to silence Shino's words with this kiss. He can't play fair all the time.]

[ He doesn't get it. His once clear vision has been clouded up with the fear and pain of mistakes and guilt. Maybe if he were a little older, he could understand how Yamagi's seeing so clearly. Right now, nothing seems as obvious as it is to the older boys.

He almost speaks, but Yamagi gives him too small an opening when he's struggling to decide what words would even be right here. Yamagi's on him and he's... surprised. He'd thought about every ounce of Yamagi's old feelings as a ghost of their past selves. He had no expectations. After all, they were family first and foremost and Yamagi deserved to learn he should have so much more than a guy like him.

But Yamagi's on him and he feels needy and selfish. He wraps his stronger arm around his back and holds him tight against his chest, only letting a few beats skip before he's kissing him right back. This? This is easy and it's as honest as he could possibly be. ]

[Well. He hasn't thought past this.

The aching, burning urge to quell Shino's doubts and words once and for all has been his main motivation, a lip lock to put an end to all of his hesitation and bare his own feelings to him. He hasn't expected Shino to kiss him back.

A small noise escapes him, swallowed in the warmth of Shino's mouth and his free hand travels down to his neck, fingers alighting at where he can feel Shino's pulse. Alive and very much thudding with blood.

His fingers press down enough for Yamagi to tilt his head and let teeth and tongue scrape against Shino's lips. I'm alive, too. I'm alive, and here and have been waiting for too long.

He can't keep killing his own heart over and over.

Fingers sliding down the back of a shirt worn for too many days in a row, they bunch in the back, not far from where the protrusion of skin and spine is, gripping a handful as if to deny Shino the whim to change his mind.]

[ Again, they're clinging to each other for dear life. They're trying to keep each other real. Shino knows he feels himself slipping into being something intangible as his stomach sinks further down. Right now, though, he's finally focused front and center on the way Yamagi grasped his shirt and pulls at his lips with his teeth.

While his arm cradles him close, his other hand smooths over his hair, getting a feel for the length of it. It's a sign of the years between them and something he hasn't quite come to terms with until now. It's no longer obscuring his face, hiding him shyly from the world. Now it's long and pretty and pulled back to show off a smile he'd only just started to see more often before he left.

Shino sighs a breath out of his nose, clinging to this kiss for as long as he can. Breaking away would feel like a betrayal and, now that it's started, he can't stop dancing around this thing between them. It's back in the present and he's loathe to let it slide back out of reach again. ]

[This time, it's different.

Shino's ruffled his hair into something resembling a bird's nest, affectionately, many times in the past. The way his large hand glides over and into his hair to cradle the back of his head is something new altogether. His breath catches in his throat and stumbles, a soft choking noise. Almost a whimper.

He may not see Yamagi's eyes when the flutter open, softened by something raw and warm at once. They take in every part of Shino at this new, negligible distance, soft spots that can pass for freckles across sun teased skin, and what parts of his face is suffused with color at their proximity.

It's a luxury he's never imagined being afforded before.

Yamagi's the one to break the kiss, leaving the faintest of distances between them, close enough for his own ragged breath to tickle Shino's lips. If he's ever doubted, himself, how ready he's been to cast Shino back into the past... Now, he knew.

Not at all.]

Don't say anything.

[It takes all his courage and well power to parse that as anything more than a plea, arms shifting to rest behind Shino's neck. If he were braver to voice his desperation, it would have been Don't leave. Pride be damned.]

[ There's no fuss when Yamagi pulls back, though he almost tries to speak. He almost takes the opportunity to speak, to ask if this is really okay, but Yamagi shuts him up before he can even breathe and he listens. For once, he's silent.

He brings both arms down to wrap around his back and hold him with care, looking at his face and the small flush that's lingering there. He keeps his head close and watches him, trying to read what he might want, might need from him. How he can make this all up to him, just a little bit. ]

[Yamagi doesn't trust himself to speak.

He'll stumble on his own words, for sure, and falter when Shino inevitably asks. He's never been good at talking when it's his own feelings on the line. Not knowing quite exactly what Shino's studying in his features, he flushes some more at how bruised he's left the other boy's lips.

When he kisses Shino this time, it's with careful gentleness, small doses of affection in little pecks against his lips, the corner of his mouth. It's the space he leaves for Shino to respond, if not verbally. This time, Yamagi's fully loathe to stop this measured confession.]

[ They both agree to silence and Shino is happy with that for once. He opts to lean back into a kiss with him, content despite the swelling of his lips. Yamagi had always been so reserved. As cute as he is when he's holding back, Shino can't help but appreciate this aggressiveness that makes him feel wanted here and now. He needed it more than he realized.

He offers sweetness for sweetness, stroking the back of his head and peppering his mouth with small kisses in return. He wants to give as much as he's getting. He doesn't want to think about anything else for right now. There's too much waiting outside of that door for him to come to terms with. This affection is far easier to stomach. ]

[Yamagi carries between his ribs a gentle secret; he's not had the chance to display this particular tenderness with anyone else--with anyone, for that matter. Softness comes with vulnerability he's not often willing to expose. Vulnerability comes with hurt.

Their noses bump and Shino's shy stubbles scratch him, eliciting a choked giggle from Yamagi. Tilting his head so Shino's fingers lose their grasp on his head, he lets them sink and run into his hair, his own lips pressed at Shino's temple, ghosting down to tickle the pulse at his neck.

And then a shove, pushing the bigger boy down against the bed.]

I want to do this with you ever day.

[It's an artless confession, as straightforward and honest as Yamagi's ever been.]

[ Yamagi's so cute, it's painful. Even if he's older now, he still maintains this sweetness to him in spite of his responsible personality. His smile and his short laugh ring in him strangely and nearly push out all his self-flagellating thoughts. He combs his fingers through his hair and lets the strands loosely tangle around the joints of his fingers.

He falls back easily and looks up at him, hands sliding down to his shoulder and his hip. He rubs his thumbs against him, putting on a smile just for him. ]

Every day? You sure?... You promise?

[ He's not used to asking things of people, but for once, he wants to know for certain. He wants something he knows he can believe in and Yamagi doesn't lie. ]

Every day. Today. Tomorrow. [It's not the sheets he'd bullied Shino into washing and folding that his elbows rest on. Nothing here is theirs. He wants to make things his again.]

Right now.

[Yamagi's never quite understood Eugene's melancholy for love. Love bruises and scrapes until you're left raw and your heart at the mercy of everything around it. He doesn't understand just yet, but for the first time, the notion doesn't fill him with abject and naked fear.

He feels safe.]

Wouldn't you want to?

[ His heart's too tender right now and Yamagi's simple, earnest works sting him. Usually, he can just laugh things off and keep it all easy and childish. His palms flinch against Yamagi's body before curling and holding on tight. ]

Course... And I do. And who wouldn't? I don't plan on being an idiot again.

[ It'd be such a waste of this second chance. Yamagi really means this. ]

And it'd take a real idiot to tell you no.

(open) back to ordinary

YAMAGI

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