closed;

[torchwoodteaboy]

Who: Ianto Jones & John Sheppard
What: Confrontation
When: During the Carnival
Where: The room they have rented in Khalo
Warning(s): dark thoughts, mean words, will update as needed!



It's odd, to be staying in Khalo Village again, after everything they've been through. With the dragon, with the wolves, with Jack... There's a part of Ianto that notes that all these terrible things seem to keep happening to John. And another, darker part of him wishes it would happen to him next instead. Maybe that time there will be no saving him. Maybe that will be better for all of them involved.

He shakes off those thoughts and feelings of melancholy as he climbs his way back up into their treetop room. Maybe it's the carnival itself that's getting to him. The way they've made the story of the dragon into an attraction: entertainment, of sorts. Or maybe it's the fact that the last time he'd been here, he had been... Uncomfortable, sunburnt, sweaty, dehydrated, and terrified of the danger looming on the horizon. But it's also, he reflects, as he pulls himself up to the top of the vine and sits on the edge of the balcony trying to remember how to breathe once more, where he had fallen in love.

Standing to turn to the separate beds behind him, a rock settles itself in his stomach. A rock that Ianto's pretty sure is there to stay, judging by how this last month has gone.

Comments

[impavid]

John is laid out on top of the bed he selected as his own, Seren curled up sleepily beside him as he reads his book. His progress through War and Peace is slow going, but he'd never planned to finish it quickly anyway. The point of picking such a long slog of a book had been to make it last.

His eyes lift at the sound of someone re-entering the accommodation, and John watches Ianto for a long moment as he recovers before dropping his eyes back to the page.

"Welcome back," he offers mildly, "have you been enjoying the festivities?"

There's a lot to learn. He figures, if nothing else, Ianto would probably enjoy the learning part.

[torchwoodteaboy]

Ianto hadn’t known whether to expect John back before him or not. It feels odd, makes him feel off-kilter that they aren’t really communicating enough to have told each other as much already. In another life, he could have imagined walking that carnival with John together. There’s a Ferris wheel, and he knows how the other man likes them.

In another life.

“Yeah, I have,” he answers, crossing to his bed and setting his bag down on it. The answer true enough. He had enjoyed the learning about all the different mythical creatures, that much was certain at least. “I could do without the Khali’s particular brand of life lessons in every tent, though.” Blood crystals, blindfolds, nectar drinks? No thank you.

[impavid]

"Not into being drugged, floral necklaces and blood rituals?"

The scathing cynicism drips pretty obviously from John's words, because no -- he wasn't especially into all that either. Even if had come to nothing, even if it had ultimately ended up seeming harmless it just... isn't John's thing.

Which is sad, in a way, because part of him would have liked to just enjoy a carnival. This feels like cruelty, one set up to tempt him that he can't actually relax and have fun with.

Or maybe he's just not in a good enough mood. Maybe part of it is him.

He scans for the page number he's on then closes the book, picking it up with his good hand to set aside.

[torchwoodteaboy]

Ianto moves to sit on the edge of his bed and glance back over at the other man, wincing as much at his tone of voice as the words themselves, but agreeing with the sentiment, honestly.

"I can't say that I am, really," he agrees. Flicking Seren the ghost of a smile as she sleepily wags at him from across the room, but staying where he is for now, despite his desire to give her a pat hello.

Leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees, he runs a hand through his hair before glancing up at John again. "Have you been back long?" he asks, wondering aloud at the other man's position, laid out on the bed, book in his lap. Hating the fact that their conversation is already as awkward as it is.

[impavid]

As Ianto sits down Seren immediately stands up on John's bed, tail wagging. John reaches out to try and steal her attention back, coaxing her into his lap. He knows it's probably petty, but he wants to feel like someone is on his side even if it's just the dog.

"Couple of hours," he admits absently, "most of the entertainments aren't friendly to people with one good arm and I wasn't sure I trusted the food or drink."

So here he is instead, reading with Seren as his company. His fingers slide into the soft ruff of fur around her face and up to rub her ears, and Seren -- easily distracted -- happily turns into the touch.

"Rodney walked around a few with me," he adds, "ran into TJ too."

[torchwoodteaboy]

"Probably wise," Ianto replies. He's not sure he had trusted most of the food or drink out there but he'd made a gamble on the shops away from the carnival itself and it's proving to be so far, so good.

He watches as Seren rises to greet him and John coaxes her out of it and leaves it be. Chewing absently on his lower lip as he listens to John talk. It's good he had the company, he reflects. Even if he could not accompany John himself, it's good that he had other friends with him.

"Learn anything interesting?" he asks, absently. That had been the point of the tents, after all. And he doubts John had been on any of the rides, with that arm.

[impavid]

Learn anything interesting? John makes a thoughtful face at that, still gently ruffling at Seren's fur.

"Oh, sure. The whole phoenix of Olympia thing was news to me. Good to know that Nadril has some suitably creepy associations, too. I figure it's the whole isolated, northern vibe they're going for. Also, it was good to learn that I'm being unfair to you by holding you accountable for stuff. That was news to me too."

So you know, all useful things to find out! Seren shifts her weight and stands slightly more on top of John, who winces and says watch those paws as she fusses. She's heavier than she used to be, and not always delicate.

[torchwoodteaboy]

It's such an abrupt change of topics that Ianto mentally stumbles over it, needing a moment to process just what exactly John had said and where it might have come from. He hadn't implied anything of the sort himself, had he? He sits up straighter, his mouth falling open as he stares at the other man and then it hits him.

TJ. He'd spoken to TJ. Shit.

"John, I..." Ianto finds himself momentarily lost for words. What the hell had she said to him?

[impavid]

John lets himself be momentarily satisfied by Ianto's surprise, making a show of still fussing over Seren still.

"It's interesting, right?" he carries on, as if it's all the same topic. Just a few things John Sheppard happened to learn at the festival. "I mean, I don't remember saying anything like that, but I guess I didn't know there were sides to this whole thing and apparently she was on your side. So, that shows what I know about it all."

[torchwoodteaboy]

Ianto's eyebrows furrow together as John paints more of the picture for him. More of what TJ must have said. About there being sides to this argument, for instance. He presses his eyes shut for a moment, feeling something like a full body wince pass over him, before he can formulate anything of a reply.

"I don't. It isn't like that," he replies, doing the best that he can to keep his voice low, level. "I don't know what she said to you but I didn't. I've never asked her to pick sides, John. And I certainly didn't tell her to say -- any of that."

In fact it had been rather the opposite, as far as he could remember. Blaming himself for the lot of it. Unfair?

[impavid]

It isn't like that.

He didn't tell her to say any of that.

John shoots Ianto a sideways, cynical squint for that.

"Well she got the idea from somewhere," he pushes, "And I haven't spoken to anyone about this so she sure didn't get it from me."

So where did it come from, then? Does TJ read minds now, Ianto? Or is she just making it up, is that what you're suggesting?

[torchwoodteaboy]

Ianto's mouth opens and closes as he struggles to formulate a response.

"Look," he begins, and tries to rein himself in. He's feeling defensive, but he needs to at least sound reasonable. "TJ and I. I spoke to her about -- our situation. But I can assure you that I was... Entirely honest of where the fault should lie. If she's feeling like she needs to defend me in some way, that's -- her decision."

Why are you upset with him over something that she said to you?

[impavid]

Entirely honest about where the fault was. Right.

John gives a cynical, mean sort of smile at that and just flicks his eyes away from Ianto -- back to the book he'd just put down. He loops his arm slightly around Seren to get her to sit then picks it up again and begins to find his page, lofting an eyebrow at it.

"Right," he says mildly, and tries to work out where he was on the page.

olympia;

[torchwoodteaboy]

They've found a sort of uneasy truce, since returning from Khalo. Since Ianto had told him about Jack. Ianto doesn't know whether it's better or worse, that John is being so gentle and understanding of that loss. He doesn't know if he wants him to be, frankly. Not that he wants him to be angry and jealous of the other man either, but still. He just wants John to be honest with him, as honest as he feels he can. So that they can move through this, and move past it.

That isn't to say that he doesn't feel as though they have made some progress. John had reassured him that he would forgive him. That he had just needed time. More time than perhaps Ianto might have himself, yes. But as he had said, he had been hurt before. And he needed time to ease back into this. Reassurance that he wouldn't be hurt again. Alright, maybe he hadn't asked for that last part. But Ianto'd like to give it, if he could.

It's what has him searching, in the end, for something solid. Some symbol he might give him, that this is real. A recognition that, for better or worse, John has him. All of him. Or as much as he can handle. Perhaps that's why the Natha give it to him, or whoever it is that are rewarding the refugees with these items as they do. At least, he'd like to think so.

When John returns to the apartment that night, at whatever time John returns home, Ianto is waiting. He has been waiting (trying not to talk himself out of it or have an anxiety attack in case this is all a terrible idea) for some time now. He's brought a little takeout container of cheesy fries, which honestly probably needs to be reheated at this point, and next to it on the counter is a fresh pack of the beer John seems to favor of late.

And beside it all is a small box.

"Hey," Ianto says, with a small, hesitant smile. "Welcome home."

[impavid]

John wasn't expecting this kind of greeting.

He pauses in the doorway, Seren throwing herself happily at his legs, and eyes the beer on the counter as he shrugs off his jacket.

"I feel like I'm missing something," he says finally, "have I forgotten a date?"

Is it an anniversary? A birthday? It seems like there's a good chance it's one of those things, but he doesn't know which. It can't be a year thing, he's pretty sure they're nowhere near that, so what else? Is there a holiday he didn't know about? Or is this going to be an apology for something John didn't even realise had happened? Or a bribe...?

[torchwoodteaboy]

Ianto briefly debates making up something on the spot just to put John in the hot seat for a moment but in truth he’s too anxious to make a decent job of it so in the end he shakes his head at the question. No, he hasn’t missed anything. This is all Ianto. He’s done it before, of course. Waited up for John with dinner and a beer. But not for a while, and certainly not since they’ve been sleeping in separate beds. Not since Jack had shown up.

“No,” Ianto replies. “This is... Well, we don’t get to see each other that much during the day, and so I thought...” He shrugs slightly, a little awkwardly, before he continues, “I thought it best to catch you now. Are you hungry?”

He’ll start off with something easy. Fussing over food, that’s relatively normal at least. He can work his way up and out from there.

[impavid]

Is he hungry?

A little, he supposes, but not a huge amount. He shrugs, hangs up his jacket and crouches down to fuss at Seren. She's so big now that he's fairly sure she could tackle him to the floor if he wanted to. His fingers comb through her thick ruff and she steps all over him excitedly, fussing back at him in turn.

"I could eat something. What're we having?"

Other than the beer, which he can see clearly.

[torchwoodteaboy]

Ianto sucks his bottom lip into his mouth at the question, chewing on it for a few moments before he replies. Planning this, he had been a little more confident in the whole thing than his delivery now. Especially understanding the gesture for exactly what it is. Up to and including his choice of food.

“Ehm,” he says, a bit awkwardly before starting again. “Well, I thought I would treat you so. They’re probably a little cold by now but.” Unpackaging the container, Ianto produces the cheesy fries with the quirk of a smile. Feeling his heart beginning to pound in his chest as he does. This was probably all a ridiculous idea, wasn’t it.

“I can, ehm. Heat them on the stove, if you’d like them warmer. We really do need to invest in a microwave some day though, at the very least,” he gripes offhandedly. Fussing is his comfort zone. He feels more in control there than he does in this unknown territory of attempting to be romantic.

[impavid]

Cheesy fries.

Now John knows he's being bribed in some way.

Not knowing exactly what for, though, makes him uneasy. He straightens up and crosses over to open a beer, eyeing the package and the rest of the table.

"Sure," he says mildly, "although I'd also like you to tell me what all this is about."

You know. Since he apparently hasn't forgotten an event of some sort. What else, then? Is Ianto about to confess something?

[torchwoodteaboy]

What it's all about. Ianto turns to start fussing with the container of takeaway so that he might be able to heat them up as requested. He really wishes they had somewhere proper to sit down. Couldn't Jack have waited until after they'd found that place together before he'd shaken things up between them, he wonders.

A little part of him wants to be difficult and question why it has to be about anything. But he doesn't need to be so difficult as that. Not now.

"I wanted to talk to you," he answers, after a pause. "We don't get to see a lot of each other, during the day. With our schedules." Both for work and the schedule they've been keeping to voluntarily. He glances up at the other man, the corner of his lips quirking as he adds, "If I'm being honest, these are mostly for added incentive to keep you from going straight to bed instead."

[impavid]

Ah.

"I knew it," John says, emphatically and with satisfaction. "I can tell when I'm being bribed!"

This was definitely bribery.

Now that he understands a little better, and that so far no dangerous topics or scary confessions have come up, John starts to relax bit by bit -- taking a pull from his beer and toying with the cap as Seren fusses around his feet.

"Well, you know me well enough to know my poison."

It's worked, he's been successfully bribed and is here still awake.

[torchwoodteaboy]

Ianto flicks the other man a wider smile. John isn't exactly a hard man to figure out, of course, but yes. He may have had a bit of insider knowledge on this one.

"Beer and greasy food," Ianto drawls back at him, setting the food to heat before turning to lean his back against the counter. "I'm lucky you don't have more expensive tastes. This might have taken some actual planning on my part."

Not to say that it was entirely spur of the moment, but. There were some spontaneous elements to it. Really the only part he'd thought about in advance had been the gift, and even that he hadn't exactly thought of how he'd wanted to present. Not that it's much of a gift in and of itself, but.

Oh, hell. Maybe he can get a few beers into John before he gets to that part. Maybe he can get a few beers into himself before he gets to that part too.

[impavid]

"I'm a cheap date," he agrees, and he boosts himself up to sit on a free patch of counter space. "You eating too, or did you already have something?"

Another test of if this is really all just a bribe for him, or if it's more communal. His eyes drift down onto the counter and John frowns curiously at the box, but leaves it alone for now -- taking another pull of his beer instead.

[torchwoodteaboy]

Oh, it's definitely a bribe alright. But Ianto's well aware that John will feel more comfortable if he isn't fussing quite so hard. He does his best to be casual as he responds, "If you're in the sharing mood."

He glances back up at the other man, raising a quizzical eyebrow at him in turn. The box on the counter beside them feels something like an elephant in the room. Ianto all too aware of it himself, and now -- well, he doesn't miss the way John's frowning down at it too. Ianto reaches to snag a beer out of the case for himself, twisting the top off and forcing himself to take a casual sip, rather than anxiously downing half the bottle in one to settle his nerves as he might prefer.

[impavid]

"I think I could be persuaded."

To share. He takes another pull on his beer before setting it down on the counter beside himself, tilts his head in the direction of the object Ianto has yet to explain.

"So -- what's in the box?"

John waggles his eyebrows back curiously, not really sure what he expects the answer to be at all.

"Cookie stash?"

You know. From Ianto's day job. Although why he'd gift-wrap that in a box John doesn't know. Just for extravagance, maybe? For fun?